Shadow Mama

A few of my favorites

2012-01-23T19:26:00.000-08:00

Just for grins, here are a few scenes that make me a happy mama:

A pre-teen who always has something to say

My two crazy chicas playing a shape-memory game

Our little ladies, all ready for church

A sweet kitty who puts up with lots of love

Doggy breath steaming up my door

Silly faces, Little People, and dirty shirts

A little treat

A daddy who rescues fish and sneaks in a science lesson

Seasons

2012-01-05T21:56:00.000-08:00

I clearly remember in August thinking, "Wow. Things are going so well right now, so smooth. That's not going to last, so I better enjoy it now."

I'm grateful for that respite, because things are piled up now. Jay's mom is having a mastectomy tomorrow, and we're hoping the tumor is small, contained, and not spread to lymph nodes. His grandmother is adjusting to life in the nursing home and recovering from a nasty infection of some sort. And his other grandma is having surgery to place a stint in an artery next Monday. And, Lainie's Trileptol dose doubles tomorrow morning.

But today, today was not tomorrow. And tomorrow's worries can wait for another 15 minutes or so. Today, I took Lainie to school and heard a great report from her teacher, who sees no side effects or behavioral changes from the medication or seizure. Praise God!

The rest of the day was Natalie-Mommy time. We hung out together, all day, just the two of us. We made rice krispie treats, her first time, and a pie. She put on a little apron, used her little oven mitt and mixing spoons, and just had fun. We watched Bubble Guppies together, colored a picture, read a few books, and tried some potty training. No fits, lots of talking, lots of tickling, and lots of giggling from her and smiling from me. I needed that.

And, then, we got the mail and had a card with no return address with a visa cash card for us, signed a friend from our church. Just as we are dropping Jay's truck off for a major mechanical repair.

God always gives us what we need, if we are willing to receive it and sometimes willing to wait for it and always willing to work for it. I truly believe that and I hope you do, too.

But I hope you can believe it without going through hardships to come to that realization.

Better

2011-12-29T18:41:00.000-08:00

Still sad, not as mad. Less "what next?!" and more "put on your big girl panties and get over it." Less anger, more prayer and thankfulness.

We have a new plan: Trileptol. I'll be focusing on THAT drug in pharmacology this spring.

We are working on the new busing plan. Lainie can't ride the bus without another adult to be there in case of a seizure, and we can't expect, or won't expect, the district to hire someone for the full 45-minute ride the girls have now. So, we will need to ask for Walleta's help (daycare) and the district's help to find a plan that will work.

She didn't lose any skills from that last seizure and is acting normal, emotionally. She's tired, has circles under her eyes, is coughing, is on motrin around the clock, and is still sleeping in my room or with the monitor on ... I just cannot yet "Let Go and Let God" enough to have her asleep in a separate room. Pray for me on that one.

We can't prevent this or predict this or stop this without God's help and guidance. We can use whatever meds we want and whatever experts we think and whatever tests they have, but if it's God's intention, then it will be.

And so, we pray. And medicate. But mostly pray.

F-bombing Christmas

2011-12-26T00:47:00.000-08:00

I dropped the f-bomb, twice, this Christmas.

But it was for a good reason. I rarely use that word, but when I do, you know it's for a worthwhile cause.

We had loaded up the kids after a fabulous Christmas Day at Jay's family. We stopped at kwik shop in Abilene for gas and I went in to get a drink for Jay. As I came out the door, I heard Katie and Maggie start screaming from the car. I felt that panic and started walked faster. Just as I rounded the back of the car, I heard Jay say "Go get your mom," saw him with Lainie, and realized she was having a seizure.

Damn. (see, no F-bomb yet.)

Jay and I got her out of the car, to the pavement, and I turned her when she vomited to clear her airway, grateful she stopped turning blue. I asked someone to start timing, asked someone to call 911, asked someone else to get my coat for her to lay on, and caressed her hair while she had a grand mal seizure. On Christmas. At 11:45 p.m. In the Kwik Shop parking lot.

The ambulance came and loaded her up, I hugged the girls and told them everything would be okay and I was proud of them, turned to Jay, hugged him, and dropped the first F-bomb of the night.

His exact response? "My thoughts exactly."

Grand mal only lasted 2 minutes, and she regained consciousness at about 12:10, at the ER in Abilene. Blood tests, fever 102.6, urine test...and a call to the neurologist = 100 mg of zonegran and restart that drug.

Second f-bomb.

I'm so sad, so mad. I don't want her drugged again. She's just now happy and calm and learning so much! Isn't there another option?

But we can't let her go through those seizures. Her pulse was racing, even an hour after the seizure, her little muscles twitching all over. On the way home, while she was still awake, she kept going through the alphabet in sign language and air-writing, like she too was making sure it was all still there, proving she hadn't lost anything with this one.

Do you think she knows?

And where do we go from here?

We'll find out later this week. Will call her doc in the morning. In the meantime, she's sleeping in our room, all of us are back home tonight and Lainie's on around the clock ibuprofen until fever is stopped or we figure out the cause.

Oh, and now it's Jay's birthday. What a gift.

Actually, it is. We are home. She's stopped seizing. We'll worry about the rest tomorrow.

Actually today...in about 5 hours.

A Weekend in Review

2011-12-04T22:04:00.000-08:00

What did I do this weekend? Well, if you start the weekend on Friday night, I:

Worked a 12-hour shift at the hospital
Took a 2-hour nap
Cooked ham and cheesy potatoes, lasagne roll-ups, taco casserole, pizza rolls, Denver omelets, meringue cookies, and caramels
Made 7 meals for my mother-in-law to use while she's recovering
Put 1 meals in our freezer for future use
7 batches of laundry
Clean sheets!
Clothes laid out for 3 girls
chapter 8 of statistics
post-clinical paperwork
pre-class reading for Monday
a few hours hanging out with a friend
another 2 hour nap
church and children's liturgy
watched Gnomeo and Juliet as a family, and
updated by blog

Still to do: find a way to get sleepy enough to go to bed, put Natalie back to bed again, pack bags for tomorrow's school, and read 8 more pages in my textbook.

Six more days of class this semester, just 6 more days

Hearty Butternut Soup

2011-11-20T10:59:00.000-08:00

With a few hundred pounds of squash in our basement, we have tried many variations of butternut soup, many of which got poured down the drain. The taste just wasn't there or the texture was icky, to use the girls' words. Today, I finally found a variation we all liked.

Hearty Butternut Soup

2-3 pounds butternut squash
2 small onions, chopped
2 carrots, peeled and sliced thin
1 tsp minced garlic
2 tablespoons flour
1/2 teaspoon majoram
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1 cup milk
1 cup chicken broth

Prepare butternut squash ahead of time by baking for 40 minutes at 400 degrees. Cool. Then, peel and dice into chunks.
In a large saucepan, saute onions, carrots, and garlic in butter until onions are translucent.
Add flour, majoram, salt and pepper. Stir on medium-high heat for one minute.
Add milk, stirring constantly.
Stir in cubed, peeled squash.
Stir in chicken broth. Reduce heat to simmer.
Allow to simmer for 10-15 minutes.

Normal vs Preferred

2011-11-19T20:22:00.000-08:00

Lately, most every night our dining room table looks like this:

Between Jay's stacks to grade and my stacks to learn, we have reached epic levels of geekdom. It's exhausting, and we are ready to be done with it all. At least Jay's stacks to grade would be easier to handle if I didn't have to rely on him so much so that I could get my homework done and still work some.

Well, this weekend, Jay is at a vegetable growers conference, so I did not sign up to work. Daddy's out of town, and Mommy doesn't have to work, translates to a girls day!

We watched Mary Poppins, because Maggie just finished reading the book, and watched Little Women, because I want Katie and Maggie to read that book.

We made Boogie Shoes for Lainie and Maggie's upcoming dance performance:

We made candle holders out of old jars, Mod Podge, and tissue paper:

Maggie and I made a batch of sugar-free, cinnamon-free Sweet Potato Bars. And Katie and I made a taco casserole for supper.There was lots of dress-up, lots of books, lots of colors, and thankfully, lots of napping.

It feels like that first warm day in spring after a terribly cold winter, the kind that smells like rain and just makes you want to dance. It was a reminder of what weekends used to be like and a glimpse of what we can return to in about 6 months. It was what I needed, more than anything. And I think it's what the girls needed too.

And there is still another day to the weekend!

Beef Stew Improv

2011-11-16T16:07:00.000-08:00

Tonight I made up a beef stew, because what better way to celebrate the first snowflakes than a big pot of stew. Because it was so, so good, and because my stew usually is edible but not delicious, and because recipes written around here get misplaced, I'm posting the recipe here (how many becauses can you get in one paragraph):

1 pound beef stew meat
1 onion, diced
2 carrots, peeled and sliced
2 cups beef broth
1 cup water
3 T worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon liquid smoke
1 bay leaf
7 potatoes, peeled and sliced thick
1/2 bag of frozen corn
2 tomatoes, peeled and chunked

Saute onions and beef in olive oil until onions are translucent and beef is just browned on the edges.
Add beef broth, water, carrots, worcestershire sauce, bay leaf, and liquid smoke. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat to low. Simmer for 30 minutes.
Add corn, tomatoes, and potatoes. Simmer for 1 hour.
Remove bay leaf and serve.

The best of the meal might not have been the stew, though. It was probably the cheddar biscuits Maggie made into stars and moon.

A Magical Autumn

2011-11-06T19:03:00.000-08:00

Today, I woke up from a four-hour nap (after working last night 7 p.m. to 7 a.m. with an extra hour thanks to the time change) and the house was silent. I was so sure the girls were off the property that I checked to see if Jay’s truck was in the driveway. Both vehicles were there. It was a first-time event: the girls were quiet and on the property and awake.

I came down stairs, groggy, and heard giggling from the front porch. Looking out the window, I saw Natalie on the picnic bench, coloring her pumpkin with chalk. I saw Lainie coloring clouds on the porch floor. I saw a tumbleweed stuck in our patio table like a patio umbrella. And, I saw Katie waving leaves around like wings.

“Look, Mommy! It’s a FairyLand! Natalie and Lainie are the tinker fairies; they are fixing the tables. Maggie’s the decorating fairy; she’s decorating our house. And I’m the dance fairy. Watch me dance, Mommy!”

When Natalie saw me, she dropped the chalk and sprinted as fast as her chubby little legs could run, jumping for a big hug and snuggle. She smelled of fall, like cool dirt and dried leaves, which only made sense, since she spent the afternoon digging potatoes with Daddy and had a fairy wreath of leaves in her hair.

Lainie was singing as she colored, one song after another. “Twinkle Twinkle” and “B-I-N-G-O” and “Wildcat Victory” and “Bubble-Guppies”… not all her songs are traditional.

Maggie was carrying a piece of soft pipe used in one of high tunnels, but it was no longer a pipe. Now it was a majorette’s baton, a ninja’s sword, a fairy’s magic wand, and eventually a Big Sister’s weapon to clock a Little Sister.

And Katie was dancing, twirling, kicking, spinning, happy with life, no worries what anyone would say, no cares about who was looking.

I know moments like these are going by too fast, and I’m so grateful I got to experience this one.


The Fairy Land

Our uncut Jack-O-Lanterns. So glad the girls didn't ask about it; we never found time to cut them this year.

Better

2011-09-23T21:01:00.000-07:00

Better day, better test score, better amount of rest, better perspective. Today is just better.

Part of the better perspective is realizing what real hardships my friends are enduring. A dear family/friend's mom is in the hospital with a serious lung infection, but thankfully it sounds like she's turned a corner and is starting to improve. And while they are getting better, things just got tougher for another friend of mine. Please pray for our friends, Team Gramkow. Their son and little brother was born today, very premature. I'm sure they could use the extra prayers, support, and good thoughts.

*****

Katie has been working her little tail off the past few weeks, getting ready for Piotique. She and her friend Erin have a little booth of craft stuff they sell. The little entrepreneurs have been doing this for three or four years, and are starting to get a real system going. At the booth this year: purses made out of old jeans, rag dolls, bracelets, and other beaded goodies.

I'm excited about it, because those jean purses were a great excuse to teach her how to sew, both by hand and with a sewing machine. I'm not an expert at either, but she has asked to try it for a long time. This was the motivator for me to sit down with her and show her the way. Plus, these little bags will make a great 4-H project and presentation, don't you think?

It did make me smile to see her running the machine:

Also, with tomorrow's Piotique comes Lainie's first dance performance. She has her moments, so we'll see how she feels about performing in front of the crowd.

Thank goodness for my in-laws, who are going to help Jay with the girls and the parade tomorrow afternoon. I'll be home sleeping, trying to rest up for my first night shift.

******

Some really cool things happened in the past week, too. I think they got lost in all the exhaustion, but they were still great.

Lainie sang me the Pledge of Allegiance. That was a tear-filled moment for me.
I got to listen to a presentation by Dr. Marianne Neifert, a national expert on breastfeeding.
With the curve, my last test wasn't too bad. At least, it wasn't the train-wreck from two weeks ago.
And, next week, financial aid finally arrives.

I would promise to not dwell on the bad stuff ever again, but I know I can't keep that promise. Some days, that's all you can see. Some days, you need a friend (or group of friends) pull you up, straighten your shoulders, and send you down the right path.

Thanks, friends!

Discouragements

2011-09-21T19:43:00.000-07:00

I've stopped making to-do lists because there is no way I can get done what needs done.
I've stopped double-accounting my checking account, because I know it's bad news every time.
I've stopped answering the home phone, because bets are that it's not good news.
I've stopped reading emails, because I don't have the time to do anything with them.
I'm letting myself down, at class, at clinicals, at home. With parenting, with housework, with just about everything.

It's tough right now. But it could be worse. And it will get better. And tomorrow is not a repeat of today.

Nope. Tomorrow provides all new opportunities to screw up. Or not.

-------

So what do I do on tough days like this? Before I even started my homework, I read an extra book to the Littles at bedtime. I spent an extra five minutes with each of the Bigs before their bedtime. I did dishes and tried to do laundry. And when the washer spun out of balance again, I didn't turn it off with more force than necessary. (See! I'm learning! Breaking the on-off button on the washer does NOT help the situation!) No. I opened the lid, and walked away.

I guess what I'm saying is, I could use some prayers! I don't have any big burdens right now, but all these little burdens are getting awfully heavy.

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I heard this song on my way home today. It made me smile, and maybe it will you too:

Back to School and Birthdays

2011-08-26T17:35:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday to my Katie-girl, my mini-me. At ten, she is as thoughtful, consciencious, considerate, responsible, and emotional as she was at 3. I am starting to catch glimpses of the adult she will become, and I'm proud of her in so many ways, for so many reasons.

I came across this video of her singing to baby Lainie a few years ago. No wonder they have such a close relationship:

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We added a few people to our house this month. Our friends are staying with us, until they can find a rental and while they transition from their home in Texas back to Clay Center. Our house is a bit louder, a bit more full, a bit more messy.

Mealtime is still my favorite, even with 7 kids and 3 adults around the table. The kids are taking turns, telling us about their days, about school. It's super-sweet -- like cotton-candy sweet -- to listen to them for that half-hour. Bedtime -- not quite as sweet. ;-)

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Back to school for all but Natalie. Lainie is loving kindergarten, although most of what we hear about is snack, lunch, and recess. Oh, and the bus. The school bus is to Lainie as mud is to a pig. She loves it and LOVES it.

Speaking of love, Maggie LOVES her new teacher. In her words, the second day of school was "A-w-e-s-o-m-e!" I hope her enthusiasm and good behavior continues, because lately we have seen a very sweet Maggie-May.

Katie is in big fifth grade. oh. my. goodness. I just realized she'll be headed to middle school next year. That's going to take me a year to adjust to that idea. But back to fifth grade: this year she gets to learn how to play my trumpet and gets to be co-responsible for the school paper. And, her BFF is in her class. What more can you ask for when you are ten.

----------------

For Katie's birthday, I took Katie, Maggie, Delaney, and two more of Katie's friends to a bigger town nearby, for a full day of shopping. I know they had a great time, but I think I enjoyed it even more. The girls skipped from store to store, strutting like a good pre-teen should. Claires. Bath and Body. Old Navy. Cici's Pizza. Freddy's Frozen Custard. Back to the mall for more shopping. Best of all, for me anyway, the girls were all so polite and kind and thoughtful. Now, that's MY kind of birthday party.

----------------

The kids aren't the only ones back to school. I am a week and a half into my one-year RN program, and already I can sigh a big breath of relief. I get home by 2 most days, have half the commute as last year, and a fraction of the homework. The content is tough and the standards are high, but that makes me even more proud to be going through this particular nursing program.

The school schedule also allows me to work a shift or two each week, which means I once again have an income. I cannot express how refreshing that feels.

I'm not going to say much about by work on here. Besides HIPAA laws and patient privacy, I just don't think you want to hear the details of my job. But I will tell you, I love it like I've never loved a job before. I get to work, not have to work. I am so motivated to learn all the skills I can, so I can provide the best level of care I can. I was worried about the 12 hour shift, but the hours fly by. I definitely made the right decision with this career move.

Now I just wish all those around me are as satisfied and self-fulfilled by their careers.

Growing, a little bit

2011-08-06T20:28:00.000-07:00

In the past month, I got all four girls in for a physical. I know, it's supposed to be near their birthday, but it is just more convenient to do it all in August. Besides, it's only one month early for Katie, three months early for Maggie, and three months late for Lainie... that works for me.

I'm sure Katie doesn't want me sharing any specifics; she's getting to that age. But, in all vagueness, I have a bunch of runts!

Natalie is 34 inches long and weighs 26 pounds. That makes her 22 percentile for height, 11 percentile for weight for her age.
Lainie is 42 inches tall, 37 pounds. That makes her 45th percentile for height, 50 percentile for weight for her age. (About average!)
Maggie is 48.5 inches tall, 55 pounds. That makes her 25 percentile for height, 50 percentile for weight for her age.
And Katie, too, is a small one, at 25 percentile for height. (Come on, she's turning ten. She doesn't want her weight listed here!)

So, it doesn't look like my girls inherited the Peterson (recessive) or Albers height. Sure, that's the recessive gene that skips this generation. And, none of them are still on the same growth curves they were as infants and toddlers. Or, maybe we are in store for some crazy growth spurts any day now.

The rest of the appointments were great, too. No big surprises, got all the school shots and doctors notes completed. Add an allergy medicine back on for one, no more seizure medicine for another, maintain this one's medications as is, none for the runt of the pack.

Oh, wait... they are all runts, aren't they? I always was a sucker for the runt.

Shoes, Schedules, and Schtuff

2011-08-03T18:42:00.000-07:00

Either Jay is feeding into my obsession or helping my organization. Only time will tell which is the case. In the meantime, look what we've accomplished:

We now have this big huge white board that covers a wall in a hallway. It replaces the itty-bitty calendar next to it, that used to list all our dates.

The new white board

I'm hoping it'll give the kids a place to see what is on which day. It's Tuesday? Oh, Maggie has PE, Katie has Art, Lainie needs her library books, Mommy has clinicals, so she'll be home late, etc.... It's not just for the kids; maybe this way Jay will know when I have a test coming up and I will know when he has a meeting after school.

Oh, and one more perk? Lainie and Maggie can practice their handwriting.

***************

And this, is our entry closet.

The shoe shelves. Aren't those little shoes just adorable all stacked up?

I can't remember if it came with four little shelves, or if Jay put those up for me. I think it came that way, making it the perfect fit for our current household size. Each daughter gets a shelf for her shoes, and only shoes that fit are allowed on their shelves. All out-of-size shoes are sorted and put in labeled bags upstairs, joining those tubs of future hand-me-down clothes. And the hang-up bag for shoes actually holds mittens, hats, and other stuff at the back of the closet.

Mommy gets the floor, which is why it's all disheveled.

Daddy doesn't get a place for his shoes. He only has three pair.

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And lest you start thinking our house is a home organizer's dream, I have my hoarding spots. Don't look under my bed. And my office desk is an endlessly rearranged stack of schtuff. Some day I'll get it cleaned off. Maybe.

I'll make this picture really small.

Modesty

2011-08-01T18:42:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago at the fair I had the amazing realization that the girls' shorts keep getting shorter as the boys' hair keeps getting longer. My friend said that was just so you couldn't see the boys' eyes checkin' out the short shorts. I think she might be onto something, and just knowing that stage is nearing our household scares me.

Quoting another source, a Focus on the Family interview a few years ago really caught my attention, enough that I remember the message, if not the messenger. It said that when your child is a toddler, you are her role model; she'll model the behaviors she sees in you. When your child is pre-teen, you become her coach; you show her right from wrong and how to do what's right. But, when your child is a teenager, you become somewhat an observer; you can give all the advice in the world, but you are still on the sidelines, watching. In other words, you better get your message across loud and clear before the pubescent-deafness-to-parents sets in.

I've taken that message to heart when it comes to modesty and my daughters. It's hard, so hard, to fight fashion trends when they don't fit with your faith system. That fight is made easier when your family and your child is surrounded by positive role models and other families and children who agree with your views.

Then, there is the battle between being proud of your body and having a positive self-esteem, but balancing that with drawing a line about what is for public view.

And one more battle, and it's a big one: the EPIC battle between mothers and daughters when it comes to clothes.

Listing all these battle lines makes me even more grateful I married the man I did. No disrespect to single moms, because I know you can handle it too, but I'm grateful I have backup, and my back-up has experience as a middle school teacher to make the words out of his mouth ring true.

Thus became this year's "Daddy's Shorts Rule". Simply put, shorts may not be shorter than they are wider. If you are shopping for shorts, grab a pair of the same size. Turn one sideways. If it is wider than it is long, put it back and forget it.

It makes sense. It's so simple. It's objective. It's measurable. It's applicable to skirts. Why didn't I think of it two years ago?!

I can't even begin to tell you how many battles the Daddy's Shorts Rule has saved me this summer, and, by my estimations, for summers to come. Katie and Maggie went all over the mall today, pointing out shorts that didn't meet Daddy's Shorts Rule and tsking at those ladies wearing contraband shorts.

Now, I'm not so naive to think my daughter(s) aren't going to battle us on clothes in the coming years, or maybe try to sneak out wearing things that wouldn't meet our approval. And I'm certainly not judging the girls that are wearing the short-shorts now, because when I had the legs for it, I was right there with you. But, maybe my girls will wear shorts that are 5 inches long instead of 4. Maybe they'll wear shirts to concerts, instead of bikini tops. Maybe this coaching team has set some ground rules while their ears are still open. And maybe one-tenth of what we are saying will stick long enough to make it through puberty. Maybe modesty will still matter.

At least we're giving it our best shot.

Better times ahead

2011-07-29T21:45:00.000-07:00

Things were just starting to get easier, until I picked up today's mail and found a handful of big, unexpected bills. Ick.

But, then I glanced over at the dance class schedule, the one I used to explain to Katie why she can't do dance class during religion. I scribbled on it this message, a hand-me-down from my high school track coach:

1. Family
2. God
3. School/Work
4. Extras

Then, I picked up our family calendar, and the page it was on said:

"Lord, show us the Father and it will be enough for us." --St. Philip at the Last Supper

And...

"Love God, serve God; everything is in that." -- St. Clare of Assisi

So, maybe things aren't so bad. Maybe I just need to have a little more faith, be a little more patient. God knows I lack patience; I just wish there was a faster way to learn how to be patient. *snicker snicker*

What I Did on My Summer Vacation: Clothes

2011-07-19T17:41:00.000-07:00

I have four daughters. Girls wear a lot of clothes. I am cheap. We love hand-me-downs. I'm a bit OCD.We were missing clothes. I start a new job in a week, and school in less than a month. Those are just few of my excuses why our living room looked like this:

Before, aka all the girls clothes in one room.

I needed to tackle this job a few months ago. I knew we were missing clothes that would fit Natalie right now, but I had no idea it was so many. All of these were stuffed in Lainie's closet, since she had just outgrown them last fall, after I started school:

Natalie's found clothes that fit now

And so we I started sorting. 0-3 months, 3-6 months, 6-9 months, 12 month summer, 12 month winter, 18 month summer... on up to size 1 in juniors. It took three evenings, but it's worth it. At the start, it looked like this:

The mountain to tackle

By the end of the first night, I had the clothes sorted and bagged from newborn to size 2. These are the hardest sizes, because you can't just eyeball a onesie and know if it's 3-6 months or 6-9 months. Each tag needed to be read.

End of Day 1

As I finished a size, I labeled the 18-gallon tub and moved it to the foyer. Suffice it to say, I'm grateful we didn't have any surprise guests this week.

End of Day 1

On night two, I tackled sorting the rest of the clothes. I knew I needed to buy more tubs, since I had at least 5 trash bags of clothes that needed a more bug-proof home. But, I needed to know how many tubs to buy before heading to town the next morning. That forced a deadline on me, making me finish all the sorting before bedtime. Doesn't size 10 look so pretty, all folded and stacked? (Yes, I really am that OCD.)

Size 10s

Before I packed up the 6s, 7s, 8s, and 10s, Katie and Maggie had a clothes-changing marathon. I might think they are size 6x but they might actually be size 8. This is by far the girls' favorite part.


Maggie's fit-now clothes

I also sorted out clothes that don't fit our girls' body type, or the size doesn't match their age. For example, we love Dora the Explorer, but by the time they grow into a size 7, they don't want anything Dora anymore. Some of these, I had just over-bought at garage sales. (I have a tendency to buy any girls jeans that don't have holes in the knees; it's bound to fit one of my daughters eventually. As a result, I had way to many toddler sized jeans.) Thus, the donation pile: three bags full, headed to Lighthouse for Christ.


The donate pile.

It's been two years since I organized the girls' clothes. With the craziness of this past year, I did not keep up with the organization. When clothes went off-season or were out-grown, they got stuffed in bags and put in closets. But now, order has resumed.

After. All the clothes in tubs, sorted and tagged.

Now, when it starts turning cold again, someday, or Lainie hits another growth spurt, I can just grab the next tub of clothes, remove the stuff from her dresser and exchange it with stuff that fits and is season appropriate. It might seem like a little thing, but to a busy mom, it is bliss.

Grilled Dessert

2011-07-16T18:16:00.000-07:00

I made a dessert with the girls tonight, one that I would never eat but they seemed to love. It came from this month's Family Fun magazine. I have an aversion to bananas and chocolate, so there is no way I'd like this one: As easy and cheap as it is to make, though, I thought it was worth a try.

Slice a peeled banana length-wise. Place the banana on a piece of aluminum foil.
Add marshmallows and chocolate chunks in the sliced banana.
Wrap it up tight and grill it on medium for 5 minutes, or until nice and gooey.

But what do the in-house critics think? A picture is worth a thousand words:

Note the chocolate stuck on her teeth

Quotes from the weekend

2011-07-10T21:44:00.000-07:00

From Katie, while watching people fan themselves in a hot movie theatre (the a/c was broken): "I think those people must all be from the city."

From Lainie, singing her version of the K-State fight song: "Fight for K-State Wildcats. For all the mothers, fight! Fight! Fight!"

From Maggie: "What do you think I should be when I grow up? I think I'd like to design shoes."

And one more from Katie: "When I grow up, I think I'll be an astronaut. And then I'll become President of the United States, because I'll be famous from being an astronaut. Then, after that, I'll design clothes. Because, who wouldn't want to buy clothes from an astronaut president."

From Lainie, making up a song in Target: "Diapers and jelly beans, diapers and jelly beans, crackers and new shirts and diapers and jelly beans."

Last but not least, from Natalie, on the way home: "Is dat God's moon?"

Yes, Natalie. Yes, it is.

The Science of Fireworks

2011-07-04T08:10:00.000-07:00

Sometimes being a lazy mama pays off. Last night, Katie and Maggie were asking SO many questions about fireworks instead of just enjoying the show. So, I gave them assignments today to answer their own questions. Best of all, I got the answers without doing the work.

Maggie's assignment was to find out why we celebrate the 4th of July. She explained, "A long time ago, 13 states fought a war to be independent from Great Britain. And it was a great war. That's why we celebrate."

Katie's was more scientific, to explain how they get the fireworks to be different colors:

Fireworks

Today I’m going to tell you about fire works. Last night I thought you would just have to put paint and food coloring in a firework to make the color but it is a lot more complicated than that. For starters it includes a lot of chemistry and science. Many firework colors are from burning metal salts. The 2 main things in fireworks to produce there colors are incandescence and Luminescence. Incandescence produces colors like red orange and yellow. The hotter it gets the lighter and brighter it gets. So when It turns hot it can be yellow or white. Luminescence on the other hand makes the fire works green or blue. To make the green fireworks there has to be chlorine in the firework. For blue fireworks there has to be more copper chloride in the firework. For better colors the fireworks have to be more expensive for an example just for the color green there is Barium compounds + chlorine producer barium chloride, BaCI+= bright green that is a lot of stuff in one firework!

Cleaning 101

2011-07-01T10:47:00.000-07:00

If cleanliness is next to Godliness, then why does cleaning with kids bring out the worst in me? Overheard in our house during today’s cleaning sweep:

“Why in the world is there duct tape and Jenga in this bag?”

“Maggie, quit reading.”

“Katie, it’s cleaning; not interior decorating.”

“Mo-ooom, Natalie messed up my stuff again!”

“Maggie, quit reading.”

“Mom, can you help me?”

“Look, Mommy! I made the beds ALL by myself!”

“Huh. I wondered where that went.”

“It’s no fair! She has less to do than me!”

“It’s no fair! I got all the hardest jobs!”

“I do it! I do it!”

But three hours later, our list is done enough to head to the pool. The jury is still out as to whether it’s easier to just do the work myself, or fight the fight to teach the girls how to clean. Someday it’ll pay off, right?

Maggie-isms

2011-06-29T20:11:00.000-07:00

My Maggie. Oh, me-oh, my- my Maggie is going to make me turn grey early. Hardly a day goes by that she doesn't either try my patience, test my parenting, or make me laugh aloud. Here's just a typical week in Maggie's world:

*****

Tonight at bedtime, we read "Going on a Bear Hunt," which ends with the family shutting the door, running upstairs, and pulling the covers over their head. After reading this delightful children's book, Maggie follows up with, "If I was that family, I'd pull out my shotgun and shoot that bear to make sure it doesn't come into my room."

*****

Today, we had a painting day for 4-H projects for the fair. The girls involved selected such lovely scenes to paint: a farm with a red barn, a pasture with two horses, a beautiful sunset... and a volcano. Guess which girl is painting a volcano, "with bright orange rivers of fiery lava flowing down the sides and a big mean ash cloud!" Yep, that's my Maggie.

*****

Yesterday, Maggie had an Alexander kind of day. You know, a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. She had just lost the privilege of playing at her friend's house and was going home to pick cherry tomatoes with dad. From the backseat of the car, in the sweetest voice you can imagine, I heard:

"Mommy, can I have a restart for this day and just start over again?"

"Yes, Maggie. I think that'd be a very good idea."

"Mommy, since the day is just starting, can I go play at C's house now?"

Ya... that's a negative there, Einstein.

*****

I went shopping with Maggie for her 4-H outfit last week. We knew she was going to wear a new pair of jeans, because, according to Maggie, "after analyzing my wardrobe, I need new jeans that don't have holes in the knees." So, the only difficult part was going to pick out a shirt. Maggie set her eyes on a bright pink shirt with some funky lace bottom and a silver crown on it. It's not my favorite, and the 4-H judge will have plenty to dislike about the bottom cut. So, the rest of the shopping day went like this:

"Maggie, do you like this one?"

"Sure... but not as much as the pink-shimmery-cool-lace-crown shirt."

Repeat ad infinitum.

*****

She drives me nuts, but I know she'll stick to her guns, no matter how much pressure others put on her. Now, if only I can establish a strong enough value system before her friends' influence out-weighs ours. We can only hope, anyway.

And I love her, just the way she is.

Don't let the smile fool you. She was screeching about every single weed.

Home School Summer School

2011-06-22T20:51:00.000-07:00

All those ads -- and listening to all the teachers in my family -- convinced me to try a home-school summer school this summer. Lainie needs to work on reading, Maggie and Lainie need to work on fine motor skills (especially writing) and Katie and Maggie wanted to work on math facts. Natalie? She just wants to be big, too.

Thanks to help from some friends and family, it wasn't too hard to find resources. Some of my favorite are Handwriting Without Tears, especially their worksheet templates, and Math Drills. Then, thanks to workbooks, coloring books and activity books we've collected over the years, I had plenty of theme-related activities, age appropriate for each of them.

Last week's theme was gardening. AKA, mama's lazy. Maggie had 6 vocabulary words (thanks to the Handwriting without Tears template) and had to write a sentence after each word. The words were garden, plants, vegetables, pollen, roots, and stem. And her sentences made me laugh:

Daddy has a garden.
It has lots of plants!
Its vegetables are great!
It has no pollen.
Some vegetables are roots.
Tomatoes grow on the leaves, and the leeks are connected to the stem.

Lainie had three words -- tomato, peas, and carrots -- and had to draw a picture of each.

Katie had a worksheet of cursive words to write, because she wanted to practice her cursive, and had to write a paper about what she senses in the garden. Here's her version:

When I'm in the garden, I smell work and tomatoes. I hear the leaves rustling in the wind. I feel fuzzy leaves and smooth ones, too. I taste delicious tomatoes and sweet carrots. I see my dad working, so I do, too.

And Natalie colored a picture of a flower, and was proud.

We all really, truly are enjoying this home-school summer school. It gives the girls something to do right after breakfast, and it makes them kick-start their brains for the day. It shows me how much Maggie does not like math, and how dedicated and determined Katie and Lainie are at their handwriting. It dedicates a certain part of the day to family time, when we are all in the same room, working in the same space. And it lets me give each girl attention, even if it's only for a minute at a time.

I wish someone had suggested this years ago.

Nurse Linda and other randomness

2011-06-20T12:26:00.000-07:00

It's official, as of last week. I am an LPN. Now that I've got the initials and that special license number, I am so excited and anxious to get to work and use and practice these skills. And by that, I mean at a location other than my house. :)

~~~~~~~~~~~

Maggie loves rock and roll. Her personality, at least at home, IS rock and roll. I don't mind her listening and learning the classics, like AC/DC or Queen. But, when she started requesting newer rock songs with lyrics I don't want to explain, I decided we needed to change things up a bit.

So, I started turning it to a Christian radio station, added it to our presets on the car radio, and turned it there when our favorite local station was "talking and stuff." Until recently, the only modern Christian songs I had heard were boring, endlessly repeating the same five words, all with the same musical interludes. The new-to-us stuff, though, is actually entertaining. Mercy Me is the girls' favorites and is ranking right up there with Taylor Swift.

I knew the switch had worked when today, Maggie asked for the "Rock and Roll Christian" music. And, she started singing:

You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You're beautiful

Now, that is music to this mom's ears, and a welcome improvement over cheating boyfriends and ugly girlfriends.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Happy Father's Day to everyone! I think Jay got shorted a bit this Father's Day, but that's been the theme for this year: keep it simple and cheap.

Natalie-New

2011-06-13T18:24:00.000-07:00

Natalie is a bruiser; she's a monkey and a bruiser. I swear a day doesn't go by that she doesn't get a new bruise or three. Unfortunately, her head and face seem to be taking the brunt of it lately. Take today, for example:

This morning, she ran into the drawer knob in our dining room and gave herself a shiner (left eye). She slid out of her chair after breakfast, hit her chin and bit her lip. This afternoon, she was climbing UP to reach something and hit her nose on the countertop, leaving a red/scrape down the top of it. And still, she's smiling.

I used to be one of those moms who, when hearing stories of kids getting all sorts of bumps and bruises and injuries, would think, "Gee, why don't they just child-proof their house and learn to tell their child 'no'." Now, I get it. We can tell her no, we do have it child-proofed...ish. But, this is one determined child. This is the girl who will carry the step stool, which is as big as she is, from the bathroom to the laundry room, just so she can try to help put laundry in the washer. If we don't have a step stool handy, she'll push her Dora car and stand on it. If the cars are all put away, she'll dump the laundry basket upside down and stand on it. Determined, with a capital D.

And so, I apologize to any mom that I previously thought could better protect their child. Natalie has just served me an ample piece of humble pie.

Natalie is not only a bruiser, she's also a freak...at least when it comes to her diet. The girl loves the strangest, non-toddler foods. Her favorites include salsa, fried okra, fresh peas, fried chicken liver, tomatoes, pickled okra, green tabasco-and-horseradish sauce*, plain hamburger, turnips, and radishes. Every time I give her a new food expecting a funny face, she downs it and sweetly says, "More?" Her sisters were most disgusted with her love of liver, because that means I finally have someone to eat it with.

*Why did we, er, I feed her tabasco and horseradish sauce? They were selling at the Manhattan Farmers Market last weekend and giving out samples, and Miss Natalie was quite insistent that she get a sample of a chip WITH the sauce. So, thinking it would be a good way for her to learn that Mommy says "no" for a reason, I gave her a taste, with her juice cup handy. Alas, no need for juice. Not even a squished up nose. Nope, the girl ate it, smiled, and asked for more. The only funny face I saw was from the vendor, as his jaw dropped.

I guess, on the bright side, she's certainly making an impression!

Feeling better

2011-06-12T19:58:00.000-07:00

I don't know if it is the nap Saturday afternoon or the sermon about being put in the flame to strengthen my faith or going to confession or getting in some study time or a good Farmers Market Saturday or some quality girl time, but I'm feeling much better about things.

Natalie feels all better, even if she looks worse. Poor girl ran into the handle on a drawer and gave herself a shiner. I know, I know... she inherited her gracefulness from me. She was probably the highlight of my weekend, when this morning she kept singing a song and then striking an end pose, and holding the pose until we would applaud. Then, she'd make a loop in the house and do it all over again. At two, she's already mastering her end pose -- I think we're in trouble.

Lainie is no worse for wear, after her week. My gosh, was that really just this past week! Looking back, I'd say it took until Saturday for her to be completely caught up on her sleep. This morning, she woke up happy and rested and full of energy and songs. Oh my, was she full of songs! The favorite of the morning, "Fire Truck! Fire Truck! I want to ride in a Fire Truck!" I'm not sure where she learned that song but here's hoping it doesn't come true.

Maggie and Katie may have seemed forgotten in all the hubbub, but really I think they are just getting used to weird things happening.

Up this week, The Test. My NCLEX aka nursing state boards aka test to get my LPN license is Wednesday morning. That's the center of our schedule this week. Around there, we also have 4-H Art-In on Tuesday morning, a ballgame Tuesday night, two Farmers Markets on Wednesday and Saturday, and that's it... at least for required attendance.

But, all that seems a feasible, less insurmountable, than it did just two days ago. For that, I am grateful.

In just one week

2011-06-09T19:58:00.000-07:00

Sometimes seven days can feel like seventy. The past week has been intense, to say the least.

Was it just last Wednesday that we had the tornado warning? The scary clouds overhead? Crazy amount of water?

And last Saturday (or was it Sunday) when we realized that the carpet was wet in the basement living room and a bedroom? Apparently, the water seeped up through a crack in the floor.

Then there was Monday night/Tuesday morning, when we/I kept Lainie up until midnight, then got her up at 4 a.m. Then, drove to Kansas City for her EEG. You can tell I'm getting more used to this, because this time I brought my camera:

At 11:20 p.m. She loved the late night!

Right before the EEG. Sleep deprived but happy to get to borrow sister's hat.

During the EEG. She was amazingly calm and patient.

The prayer request was that the EEG would show no abnormal activity. Or, if that's not God's will, that we can have God's grace to accept what is the result and that Lainie would not be afraid. Two out of three isn't bad. Lainie wasn't scared at all, and based on what I saw during and immediately after the EEG, I was prepared for the bad news. The EEG shows "significant spikes in the left frontal lobe" so her brain is still a bit too charged; in other words, the risk for seizures is still elevated. The neurologist we saw after the EEG did not elicit confidence or trust, to put it lightly, so we are not following his recommendation to "stop her medication anyway" and are waiting to talk to her neurologist in two weeks.

That day, Jay also took Mags to see her allergy and asthma specialist. Their appointment wasn't as fruitful, but they did say her lung function has improved dramatically, compared to before she started the Advair. They still aren't sure what's going on with the sugar stuff, as he says kids can't have an actual allergy to sugar/sucrose. But, as he said before, if we see a negative response when she eats sugar, then don't give her sugar. We will try to reintroduce milk again this summer, but not right now. We've got enough going right now.

And we thought that'd be the worst of the week. True, we still have one girl at Pioneer Camp for five days, and two girls at VBS for five days, and two nights of softball and two days of Farmers Market. But, Natalie had other plans.

Wednesday night I told her and her sisters to head upstairs to bed while I finished up the last of our supper dishes. I heard her take two steps up, then a crash. That's not anything unusual; our girls are accident prone. But, as I came around the corner, I saw her try to take a step toward me and her legs gave out. Then she started to just whimper and her arms were just limp. I picked her up (probably shouldn't have) and then laid her down on the carpet. She still wasn't moving her arms or one leg, and wasn't crying, so I was worried that she had messed up her spinal cord or neck or something...she just wasn't right. I couldn't think of a way to get her to the hospital while securing her neck, since Jay wasn't home, so I called the ambulance. Yep, Nat gets the distinguished honor of being the first (and hopefully only) family member to ride in the ambulance. Our wonderful! neighbor drove up to stay with Maggie and Lainie, and I went with Natalie to the hospital.

By the time we got there, Jay and Walleta were there (gotta love word of mouth and facebook). Natalie was moving her arms and legs by then, but wasn't crying out, wasn't fighting the neck brace or straps holding her down, so I was still worried. Thankfully, about the time they were taking her down the hall for a CT scan, she got mad and started to cry. The CT Scan was clear, and she was sent home with diagnosis of concussion.

So, every two hours, we (I) got her up overnight and made sure she was still okay. In between wake-ups, she didn't want to sleep much, so it was a very sleepless night. Today, she got more active as the day went on, but she still complained of a headache and she didn't like the loud music at VBS when we picked up sisters. But, all's well that end's well. I just wish I knew how she fell, and how such a small fall could hurt that much.

I'm tired. I'm exhausted. I have the NCLEX in 6 days. I can't study Saturday morning, Sunday morning, or Tuesday morning. But, thanks to friends, I can study tomorrow and Monday, especially. And you can bet your bottom I'll be studying every spare minute I can.

So, self: no more blogging! Get back to the ATI and NCLEX review!

And the pendelum swings back...

2011-06-04T21:12:00.000-07:00

You know how before we were having such an amazing string of good luck, good fortune, and charity? Well, it is feeling like the pendulum is swinging back the other way.

Now, I'll be the first to say we've been very, very fortunate. With the series of severe storms that have passed overhead in the past seven days, we are lucky to have our house -- much less all six high tunnels -- still standing. Serious rotation overhead, 8+ inches of rain in less than 7 hours, crazy-large hail to the south of us that died out before it got to us.... ya, we know we're lucky.

Flooding down the hill

But (in chronological order)...

the lettuce all got some sort of slime and all 40 or so lettuce heads had to be harvested and trashed
the salad mix all turned bitter, so it all needs torn out and trashed
all the radishes and most of the turnips bolted, so they are no longer harvested, so even less to sell at the markets
some of the Bok Choy also bolted, leaving it only harvestable for our own use
the aphids "found" the bok choy, so the aphid battle continues, and
the icing on the cake...we thought we only had one itty bitty little wet spot on the south side of the basement from all that rain. Instead, tonight we discovered the rain water that had seeped up into the carpet in two rooms of the basement.

So, tonight and tomorrow, we are moving out those two rooms and getting the carpet outside. On the bright side, we'll be able to use Jay's low tunnel arches to drape the carpet and let it dry out without getting all buggy.

Add to that the expected stresses for a family of six on one and a half incomes, Lainie's medical testing in two days, and my NCLEX in 10 days...and I am needing to remember how wonderful things were a couple months ago.

Or, I can pull a Scarlet O'Hara and at least try to worry about it tomorrow. Because today, there are giggles to hear.

Pool time! The girls are so excited about their perfect, new swimsuits that someone anonymously gave us. Thank you!

Last Day of School

2011-05-26T09:16:00.000-07:00

Waiting to go to Walleta's

Practicing "Pool Time!"

Last day of school pose

My new favorite photo!

Unnecessary stressing

2011-05-25T11:42:00.000-07:00

We decided to send Lainie to kindergarten. I’m not sure who is happier about that: Lainie or us.

Then, after we made that decision, a dear friend pointed out to me that I read the kindergarten assessment letter incorrectly. What I thought was the minimum level is actually the median score. She scored above the recommended level to go to kindergarten! We aren't bucking the system sending her; we are doing what the assessment said was right. Quite a jump from the assessment we heard back in February, when she was behind in so many areas. She still has a need for improvement, but she has improved so much already. That girl of ours works her tail off, and I couldn’t be more proud!

It’s a big week around here, the Last. Week. Of. School. That’s exciting for any family with kids in school, but it’s even more so when your spouse is a teacher. My honey-do list is nice and long and detailed. :) But even better, we are going to get reacquainted as a family. More family time, more sleeping in (in theory!), less running around and more time at home; that’s the goal.

Not that we won’t be running some. Katie and Maggie are in softball; Katie has Pioneer Camp; Katie, Maggie and Lainie have vacation bible school and Totus Tuus; K, M, & L have swimming lessons; 4-H projects are underway; the great reading program at our local library; all of us girls want some pool time; doctor visits and tests; and of course we have four or more Farmers Markets each week.

I also plan on a home-schooled summer school for at least my two Middles. They both still need to work on hand-writing and math, and I think we can do it in a fun way. I’m picturing the five of us sitting down at the table, Natalie with her colors, Lainie and Maggie with pencil/paper, and Katie with her educational Web sites. I know the picture in my head isn’t likely to match reality, but it’s a nice dream.

But right now, I’m just dreaming of the weekend, our first weekend of summer!

The Debate: To send or to wait

2011-05-18T18:56:00.000-07:00

The debate continues in our house, whether or not Lainie is ready for kindergarten. Some days I think yes and Jay thinks no. Other days Jay thinks yes and I think no. One educator says yes, another says no, a doctor says yes, a therapist says no. Back and forth, yes or no, snippets of so many conversations and evaluations running through my head. “I’ve never heard of anyone regretting holding them back.” “She doesn’t learn at a gradual pace; she makes big jumps at a time.” “Twenty-five kids in a class is a lot; she could get lost in that group.” “She’s age appropriate in this level and this level and this level…”

Tonight, I decided to ask her if she wanted to go to kindergarten or preschool. She thought for a minute, then asked, “Will Kindergarten be hard?” “Yes,” I answered her. “It will be very hard for you. Preschool would be fun, and kindergarten will be hard. What do you want to do?” “I want to go to Kindergarten, Mommy.”

And after that conversation, she was the happiest girl all night long. She was talking in full sentences, she was doing chores and following directions, and she was taking turns with her sisters and helping her baby sis.She was, is, happy.

How much weight do I put on what she wants? She is “only” five. But, when Katie was a month past her third birthday, she cried and cried to go to preschool, so we signed her up and she started in October. If we let a three-year-old Katie dictate her schooling at that age, shouldn’t we listen to a five-year-old Lainie?

One of the most compelling arguments for me is how hard it could be on her, emotionally, if she needs to retake kindergarten. From what I’m seeing and hearing, redoing preschool would be just as hard on her heart as two years of kindergarten. So, why not let her press on and push her? She’s worked hard and diligently to get this far. Why should next year be any different?

But if Kindergarten is hard, will she decide she doesn't like school and carry that attitude throughout? Will she dread when the bus shows up? Will her classmates alienate her for talking differently? Would another year make a difference in any of those categories?

Oh, this is one of those times I wish someone else would make the parenting decisions.

So much!

2011-05-17T06:57:00.000-07:00

I had to ignore the blog, put it on the back burner, to get through those last crazy weeks of school. So, no post about Lainie's 5th birthday. No post about the Katie's and Maggie's music programs and activities. No post about Natalie's move to the big girl bed. And no post about graduation... except to say all those things happened and were good. Very good.

Now, it's transition time. We have to transition back to a two-person parenting style, where we both parent at the same time instead of tag-teaming it. We have to transition to me taking over the household duties that we had been sharing. I will transition into my summer job, working on the garden, knowing Jay is still the decision-maker in that avenue. But probably the toughest transition will be getting used to all six of us home, every day, together, for two wonderful months.

That's a lot of family time for us, and it's sad to say that's not the norm. Obviously that isn't our norm, since we all head our separate ways, to school and work and daycare. Already the girls have had more sister-time than usual, and there have been plenty of arguments because of it. So far, I've been letting them just work it out on their own, no matter how loud it gets, as long as it doesn't turn physical. I'm not sure that's the best approach, but it's my approach. Natalie can definitely hold her own, so the baby doesn't need babying. It's good practice for Lainie and Maggie, making them work on their speech. If anyone needs defending, it's Katie, because she'll concede defeat, give up what was rightfully hers, just to keep the peace. So, even she can use the practice of standing up for herself.

Jay jokes that he has six high tunnels because there are six people in our family: everyone gets a high tunnel. I will bet that by the end of the summer, we will have used that our advantage. "Katie, go to building A. Maggie, go to building B. Weed it and pick it and don't come out until you lose your attitude."

Speaking of attitude, we have a new favorite break-the-mood saying: "Lose your atti-toot-ee. It's stinks."

My Two-Year-Olds

2011-05-09T11:58:00.000-07:00

It amazes me how different our girls are, even when you compare them at the same age. Just for fun, I scanned in their two-year-old portraits today. What a difference!

Katie

Maggie

Lainie

Natalie

And what I remember from each of these pictures is as different as the pictures themselves.

Katie loved to cheese for the camera and taking her in for pictures was (and is) a breeze. Maggie didn't want to smile but would stand there and wait as long a book was in sight. Lainie didn't want to stand still, hence the bribes of flower petals and the "about-to-take-off" pose. And Natalie? She threw up about 5 minutes before this picture was taken. So, like any good fourth-timer who had just driven 45 minutes to get pictures taken, I assumed it was just car-sickness, changed her clothes and put her in front of the camera. (And, no, she didn't throw up any more that day.)

Patience Cup

2011-04-23T13:34:00.000-07:00

During Holy Thursday Mass, Father was talking about the many blessings that God gives us and how difficult it can be to see those blessings when we are so busy, so overcome with the day to day tasks. I smiled contently, thinking of my blessings, the three little ones at home with Jay (which was a blessing in itself, not fighting them through mass) and the one little blessing sitting on the altar as a server. And I almost laughed aloud, thinking how just a few hours earlier, I wasn't feeling so blessed.

Thus became The Patience Cup.

By 6 p.m. Thursday night, my patience was gone and I had resorted to yelling. Katie was really hurt by this, saying she didn't do anything wrong. So, I showed her this cup and told her to imagine that this cup is my patience. Then I drew the first line:

"That first line? That shows how much patience Natalie used up, by screaming from the moment I picked her up at daycare until the moment she went to bed...with just a few exceptions. She used up that much of my patience all by herself."

"The second line? That's how much patience Maggie used up, with her screaming tantrums and throwing fits every time I asked her to do anything. Even picking up her own shoes resulted in a fit. So, she used up that much more of my patience."

"That left this little area for you (Katie) and Lainie to share, just a little bit of my patience left. And, although you weren't being bad, the constant 'Mommy, look here!' 'Mommy, I need this!' 'Mommy, she touched me!' 'Mommy! Hurry up with supper! We're going to be LATE!' used up the remaining little bit of patience until my patience cup exploded:"

"And it's never pretty when a Patience Cup explodes. So, I promise to do my best to not let my Patience explode if you could please just walk away for a few minutes when it looks like the cup is getting full. Okay? Sometimes all it takes is 60 seconds of quiet to restore the Patience Cup."

The lesson must have sunk in a little, because I've probably been asked a dozen times today, "How's your patience cup doing, Mommy?" Gotta love that girl of mine!

Closing Shop

2011-04-04T20:52:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling overwhelmed. Nothing major is going on, but lots of minor events are. A little bit here, a little bit there, and suddenly it feels like we are spiralling out of control. (I know... am I really that busy if I'm taking the time to blog? Well, I have no excuse.)

Tonight, I did some visualization to try to calm my racing thoughts, and it worked. I imagined standing in a house full of windows, and each window had a set of shutters on it. I walked to each window, looked at the task or responsibility in that window, and then decided whether to leave the shutters open or close it for now. Need to call someone back, just for fun? Shut the shutters. "Mom, my jeans are dirty and I need them tomorrow." Shutters stay open. "We need to order shirts for this summer." Shutters closed. Clinicals in 8 hours and need to know the drugs I'll be administering. Shutters open. When I can close half the shutters, the remaining half don't seem so insurmountable.

Beef Marinade and Chicken & Pasta

2011-04-02T17:17:00.000-07:00

Saturday was a laid-back day for us, so I did some experimenting with recipes. Both creations were really tasty.

For lunch, I grilled tri-tip steak marinated in balsamic vinegar, sesame oil, and teryaki sauce. That marinade smelled so good, I just about wanted to drink it...but that would be over the top, don't you think? Served with grilled pineapple and steamed rice.

For supper, we had a pasta creation. It's a combination of four different recipes, and it was rich but delicious.

Pasta & Chicken & Schtuff

3 chicken breasts, cubed
3 slices of bacon, diced
4 leeks, sliced
4 tablespoons butter
6-7 mushrooms, sliced
2 Tablespoons flour
1 cup milk
1/4 teaspoon salt
3 tablespoons Parmesan cheese
Pasta of your choice

In a large skillet, saute bacon and leeks until bacon is crisp and leeks are softened. Remove from skillet and keep warm.
Add 1 tablespoon butter to the skillet. Add chicken and saute until cooked thoroughly, about 10 minutes.
(Now's a good time to start the pasta cooking.)
While chicken is cooking, melt 2 tablespoons butter in a small saucepan on medium heat. Stir in two tablespoons flour and 1/4 teaspoon salt. Cook for 4-5 minutes, stirring often.
Add 1 cup milk to the flour mixture, stirring continuously until all lumps are gone.
Sprinkle Parmesan cheese into white sauce. Cook on medium until cheese is melted, stirring occasionally.
Now back to the chicken skillet. Remove chicken from pan, putting it with the bacon and leeks.
Melt1 tablespoon butter in skillet. Add mushrooms and saute for 2-3 minutes.
Return the bacon, leeks and chicken to the skillet. Stir together.
Pour the white sauce over the chicken mixture. Stir.
Serve over the pasta.

They'll be days like this

2011-04-02T11:15:00.000-07:00

This week was definitely a busy, up-and-down roller coaster. We had the usual: 2 days of clinicals, 3 days of lecture, 2 trips to Manhattan for speech, 1 trip to Abilene for food pick-up, 2 nights of dance, 1 night of religion, and a whole lotta gardening. (Hmm, that list makes me question where our priorities are...but that's a thought for another day.) Add to the usual, Katie's art night and Katie's fine arts program, and it was just going to be busy.

So, to make things more exciting, my brother flipped his car on Wednesday afternoon. He ended up with only 4 staples in his head, but no broken bones and one totaled car. (I am responsible for him up here and was the go-to person to get him through the crisis.) My mom has been/is sick with something to do with her gall bladder and made a trip to the hospital for that. And, Lainie added excitement with her own minor complication.

But, on the bright side, Katie had a really good week, with quite a few self-esteem-saturating successes. Maggie was a super-duper helper and just a joy to be around this week, and Natalie's two-ness wasn't near as intense as weeks past. I also got good news and wrapped up some portions of my nursing stuff, and finished half of my microbiology course, which is as far ahead as I can work.

It's easy to be happy and thankful when things are going smooth as silk. It gets tougher when there are obstacles in the road. When too many pebbles coagulate, they become one big mountain that seems insurmountable. And this week, we had lots of pebbles.

What made the mountain manageable is the amazing friends we have here. When Anthony had his wreck, I was waiting for Maggie to get off the bus so we could go pick up Natalie and then Katie. In 3 minutes and 3 phone calls, we had someone taking responsibility for each of the girls, not only to watch them, but even to feed them and get K&M to religion as planned. Amazing. Just humbling-ly amazing. Proof that, together, we can move mountains.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next week is going to be just as busy, but hopefully no pebbles get in our path. Three days lecture, 1 test, 2 days clinicals, 5 days teaching (Jay!), 5 days gardening (Jay!), 2 trips to Manhattan for speech, 2 nights of dance, 1 night of religion, plus Maggie's fine arts program, K&M's spring dance dress rehearsal and spring recital on Sunday, and a 10K and 2 tests to study for me.

Between last week's craziness and next week's craziness is one beautiful weekend, full of outside time, garden planting, a trip to the zoo, and family time.

Lainie Update

2011-03-25T17:52:00.000-07:00

We had Lainie's appointment with her neurologist this week in Kansas City, and were very happy with the results. He is happy with the progress that she's made, and we are still planning to do a repeat EEG this summer. If the EEG does not show any irregular activity, then she'll wean off her anti-seizure medication. That's the hope, since the medicine has the potential for some serious side effects and any time we can stop medication, we will. But, if she need it, if the EEG is still abnormal, then she'll stay on the medication and be thankful for our safety net.

I realize more and more I am getting frustrated with the stuff she doesn't know or doesn't remember or won't tell us. I wish I knew how much to push her, how much to let it go, how much to force her out of her comfort zone, how much to protect her. Then again, that wish is not limited to Lainie. That wish goes for all my girls. That is probably the knowledge wished for by all mothers for all time. How can we be the best moms for our children, let them be babies, let them be kids, but help them grow up strong and independent?

Potato planters

2011-03-24T19:14:00.001-07:00

Differences

2011-03-24T17:52:00.000-07:00

In twenty years, Katie and Natalie will sit down and realize how very, very different their childhoods were. I know it's bad when I can see it already.

For instance, Katie, Maggie, and Lainie were all out of the crib at or near their second birthday, mostly because a little sister was on the way and the crib needed to be vacated. Natalie loves to lay down on the big bed, but I just don't want to mess with it. She goes to bed so easy now and I'm afraid it would be too much to try to get her to stay in a toddler bed when I'm trying to cram for a test or finish a homework assignment. And so, she's still in the crib, at least until this summer.

On the flip side, in some ways she is growing up faster than her sisters. Tonight, Natalie was outside with a small bucket of potatoes, helping plant 10 short rows before the rain came. With her older sisters, I would have worried about it being too cold or too late or too hard or of course she can't do it! Now, we treat her the same as her sisters, or else she lets us know her displeasure, in a very loud, vocal way.

I think some differences in upbringing are okay, like freedom on the playground and extra babying now and then. But when it comes to rights-of-passage, like when you get your ears pierced or when you have your first sleepover or permission to date, I'm adamant that they all reach those milestones at the same age.

Then again, maybe I better write that one in pencil. Ask me again in 15 years.

Spring Break Sibling Sweetness

2011-03-22T16:34:00.000-07:00

Maggie (to Lainie): You are NOT the boss of ME!
Lainie: Am too.
Maggie: You are NOT the BOSS of ME, Bossiest Bossy!
Lainie: I am TOO the Boss. You are only FIVE!
Maggie: I am NOT five, I am seven!
Lainie: Oh. Well, then. Here you go. (giving up whatever toy started the fight.)
And peaceful playful bliss returned!

~~~~~~~

Today we were in the basement when Jay calmly announced, "Building C is airborne." Building C is one of our high tunnels, and the east side was in fact taking off, like a big, giant, expensive kite. Jay took off running, and I followed, pausing just long enough to say, "Maggie, you're in charge. Watch your sisters."

And so, while I held onto the east side of the building and Jay reattached and re-secured what the crazy Kansas winds had undone, Maggie was in charge, babysitting of sorts.

I was more than a little anxious when I returned to the basement, but my anxiety immediately changed to amazement. Maggie had Lainie in the chair next to her and Natalie on her lap, and the three of them were peacefully playing on www.starfall.com. "I'm teaching them how to read," Maggie said. Proceed! Proud moment indeed!

St Patty's Day Race 2011

2011-03-19T21:12:00.000-07:00


Before the race

I ran a race today and really struggled to not cry through most of it. I wasn't in pain, I felt great physically, but I kept tearing up from what happened 20 minutes before the race.

Katie ran her first 2 mile in 22:27.


Katie at the finish line

She had never ran the full two miles before. She'd run about a mile, then walk, then run, then walk, etc. I was hoping she'd finish in 30 minutes, so at 22 minutes, I was stretching near the finish line. I heard her call "MOMMY!" as she ran past. I looked at the timing clock, and literally started to cry. Apparently little miss ran the entire race! I'm so proud of her! She's so proud of herself. Or, she was proud of her time. She's disappointed that she got 13th place for her age bracket, when only the top 10 get a ribbon or medal.

She is so my daughter. I also ran today, my first 10K. I was hoping to finish under 65 minutes, but realistically was aiming for less than 75 minutes. Even in the rain, wind and cold temps, I finished it in 58:39, beating my expectations considerably. I give big credit to my in-race couch, Chuck, Andrea's dad, who kept me on pace the first four miles and then told me to "go after it." But, just like my Katie, I too was a little disappointed in my 37th place finish for my age bracket. I guess we'll see what my time looks like in two weeks, when I run the Abilene race.

(Why do I have my hands in my pockets while I'm running? Because I'm about to take off my jacket to give to Jay, at the 4-mile mark. But this is proof you CAN smile and run at the same time.)

But how can you stay disappointed with cheerleaders like these:


Mags and Dad, looking like thugs

My girls and I, post race

Spareribs for Supper

2011-03-12T14:35:00.000-08:00

Tonight's pork sparerib supper is my favorite! It's messy, takes hours to cook (if you're doing it right, IMO), but oh so delicious. And, I can throw in some potatoes for baking while it cooks!

My favorite sparerib recipe is based off a Taste of Home recipe, with some kid-friendly adaptations:

4 pounds pork spareribs
1 bottle (28 ounces) barbecue sauce
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon liquid smoke
1-1/2 teaspoons onion powder
1 to 1-1/2 tablespoons molasses
1 to 2 tablespoons honey

Boil ribs in water for 10 minutes.
Cool just enough to be able to pick them up. Then, cut into serving size portions and place ribs in an ungreased 13-in. x 9-in. baking dish.
Combine the barbecue sauce, onion salt, brown sugar, Worcestershire sauce, liquid smoke, molasses, and honey. Pour sauce over ribs.
Bake, covered, for 1 hour at 350 degrees.
Bake, uncovered, for 30-45 minutes or until ribs are tender and sauce is thickened, turning ribs several times to coat with sauce.

How do you make YOUR ribs?

Or maybe not better...

2011-03-11T19:20:00.000-08:00

Both girls felt better for not quite a full day, and then restarted the fevers and respiratory symptoms. I decided to take them to the doc today, thinking that if it IS bacterial, they can start antibiotics and feel better by Monday. My prediction going in was Lainie sinus infection and Natalie ear infection and possible bronchitis.

I was close. Lainie, doc said, might still just be fighting the virus, but she's willing to go ahead and start the antibiotics for sinuses and see what happens. Doc said with a fever that high (102.5+) that it made her think it was viral.

Natalie surprised me with a possibly ruptured ear drum, definite ear infection in both ears, and "her lungs don't sound good either." She also is starting antibiotics, with instructions that if she isn't much better by Monday, she needs to be seen again. Much better than what?! She was fussy, wouldn't eat, and had an on-and-off low fever. I would think a ruptured ear drum would elicit more response than that!

But then again, Natalie IS Maggie's little sister. Maggie, who never cried when her ear drum ruptured multiple times, who had a bit of a cough and ended up hospitalized for bronchiolitis, who fell down the stairs and came up laughing.

And Lainie's symptoms and reaction this past weekend mean an appointment with her neurologist in two weeks. I wonder what THAT appointment is going to bring.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Because our lives aren't completely engulfed by illness, school is going well, too. We now have less than 40 days of classroom time until graduation. I think we have 3 ATIs (a standardized test) yet to do this semester, and who knows how many more classroom tests, worksheets, critical thinking exercises, care plans, assessments, and journal entries. I can see the finish line.

And, speaking of finish lines, in 8 days, I will run my first 10K race. I've been training for it since New Years and am scared, anxious, and already feeling the adrenaline. My goal is to not walk any of it, but I also know it's a tough, hilly course.

I love running. I don't love getting started, but once I'm out and moving, I love it. It's alone time, prayer time, quiet time, thinking time. This is the first year since college that I've been able to dedicate scheduled time to exercise. It's also the healthiest year I have had in years. This nasty round of sickness that hit Jay, Katie, Lainie and Natalie? I didn't get it, despite being sneezed on, coughed on, cleaning up all sorts of body fluids, and the added germs from school/clinicals. I don't think I'm doing anything different than last year, except the exercise. If that's not motivation to keep it going, I don't know what is.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

And since my life right now DOES revolve around (sick and healthy) kids and school, I didn't realize anything was going on in Japan until after noon today. The pictures and video are so stunning, breathtaking images of mass destruction. But I just keep thinking with each wave, how many people were killed? How many lives destroyed?

We watched the move 2012 last year and enjoyed it. But, you can't watch that movie and not get a little freaked by the recent events. What would you do if this was our last year on earth? Shouldn't we live as if every year, every day, is our last on earth? If you knew what tomorrow would bring, what would you change?

The more I think about it, the more my plan is simple: enjoy the present, plan for the future, let go of the past.

What's your plan?

Much better

2011-03-08T07:49:00.000-08:00

A quick photo opp this morning shows just how much better they are.

Better

2011-03-07T18:40:00.000-08:00

L's better, much better. I can let her sleep in her own bed tonight and not worry. She kept her medicine down last night, no more fever, ate toast and waffles today, and is feisty enough to fight bedtime tonight. Three good signs in my book.

I'm not trying to be over-dramatic. I know there are others out there who deal with a lot worse on a daily basis. Lainie's health just happens to be my ultimate fear, my test of faith. Some days my faith is overcome by my fear. She makes me really mean those words when we say the Goodnight Prayer and Angel of God prayer. Some nights, it's more a plead than a prayer. And every night, it is a "thank you", knowing how close we were to not having this adorable little girl to worry about.

The rest of the family didn't skate by this round, though. Katie, Natalie, and Jay all came down with some version of the illness, all a milder version (at this point). Maggie and I apparently are too ornery to get sick. Or, maybe it was the cutie oranges and Sunny D we were downing Saturday and Sunday, and the "wash hands until they are cracked and bleeding" routine. Or, I froze the germs off me during a 5-mile run early Sunday morning. Either way, I'm grateful.

So, now we return to our regularly scheduled program. Homework awaits.

Oh, now I remember!

2011-03-06T14:34:00.000-08:00

I am hyper-sensitive when Lainie gets sick with even the simplest of colds, but had forgotten why. This weekend reminded me. (warning: this is not for those with an aversion to snot, vomit, or other fluids.)

Lainie got a cold, some sort of virus, that produced lots of snot. She doesn't blow her nose, like most kids her age, and the nasty stuff went down her throat instead.

All that mucus in her stomach made her start vomiting. I know it was the cause because that's all that's come up: lots of mucus. (My classmates who know my aversion to mucus KNOW how awful that was to see.)

Because she kept vomiting, she also vomited up her anti-seizure medicine that she takes each night. This is one of those medicines that you MUST take every night, or risk serious side effects. So, after seeing the undissolved pills in the toilet, I called the on-call pediatrician who said to give them again, just once more, and hope she absorbs some medicine.

That's when I got a clear picture of why medical professionals don't take care of their own family members. I was in pure mom mode, and it was Jay who thought to take the medicine out of the capsule, mix it with applesauce, and give it a better chance of absorbing. So, she got her second dose of zonegran, which came back up after 20 minutes.

This is a double-blow, because illnesses trigger her seizures, and she just lost the safety net to prevent them. All we can do is hope, pray, watch and wait.

Taken last night

Today, no tonic-clonic seizures, which was the optimal hope last night. She's been awake all of about 15 minutes today, but isn't dehydrated. She was just able to keep down about 1/4 cup of applesauce and about that much apple juice. She is talking to me now. That's the good news.

The bad news is, what looks like seizure activity in her legs. She says she can't control it and can't stop it. That makes me so sad for her. For the nurses out there, her pain is still localized to the right eye and right side of her skull, and her right pupil is sluggish but reactive. And, she is very slow to follow any commands, her left eye is half-closed and she's unable to open her eyes wide.

All because of a simple, stupid cold.

Banana Bread and bits of randomness

2011-03-04T22:19:00.000-08:00

Lainie has her first real illness of the school year, at least as far as I can remember. If she's been sick since August, it must have been minor enough that I didn't take off school for it. And, just by bringing her home before lunch, a lot of juice, fruit, Dora the Explorer and reading books, and one hefty 3 and a half hour nap, she already looks a thousand times better than she did last night. That makes me a very happy mama.

I'm more than a little paranoid at any illness Lainie picks up. And I wonder if I'll ever stop being that way. Probably not.

Updated to add: or maybe not. A trip to Manhattan confirmed that it's just a virus, not influenza. And Lainie punctuated my poor judgment in running her to the doctor by vomiting all over my car at the Tuttle Creek - Anderson Ave intersection. Never a dull moment.

Updated again to comment: probably not the best idea to post a recipe and vomit story in the same post.

~~~~~~~~

I have one cousin at 34 weeks gestation with twins, on bedrest, and another cousin 36 weeks gestation, on bedrest. It's a sprint to the finish, if by sprint you mean waddle race, and I'm so very excited to meet all three bambinos!

Bedrest is a lot more fun from this side -- the lame advice side -- of things, and not so much from the couch-side of things.

~~~~~~~~~

Katie's been struggling with how to deal with a difficult personality lately, and my advice had been to avoid her or just ignore it. But then a friend posted this quote on facebook:

A Rattlesnake, if cornered, will become so angry it will bite itself. That is exactly what the harboring of hate and resentment against others is - a biting of oneself. We think we are harming others in holding these spites and hates, but the deeper harm is to ourselves. ~E. Stanley Jones

It got me thinking, a lot. Suppressing her frustration is probably not the best course of action, but neither is confronting this bully. I don't have the answers, and that is tough for a mom to admit. Right now, the best I can do is try to show Katie what difficulties this young person is going through, a possible explanation for her rudeness. I can hope Katie won't stoop, but will instead rise above all this. But in the end, Katie will do what she needs to do, make her own decisions and actions, right or wrong.

Either way, mean people just suck.

~~~~~~~~~~

Tomorrow is Saturday, and I'm not studying. Take that, ATI test! I am going to cram like crazy on Sunday and the rest of the week, but tomorrow is Girl Day. So far, our to-do list includes pancake breakfast, making sugar-free banana bread, putting on fake tattoos and painting fingernails. Oh, and laundry and dishes and bathroom cleaning and all that boring stuff. But, for tonight, I'd rather just focus on fun stuff tonight:

1 1/4 cup ripe Chiquita Bananas
1 1/3 cup all purpose flour
3/4 cup Splenda brown sugar
1/3 cup buttermilk, regular or reduced fat
1/2 cup shredded carrots
1 Tbsp. canola oil
1 tsp. baking powder
1/8 tsp. salt
2 tsp. vanilla extract
1/2 cup walnuts or pecans (optional)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F and spray one 9.5-inch loaf pan.
Place oil, buttermilk, Splenda, vanilla and mashed Chiquita Bananas into mixer.
Mix on low speed for two minutes.
Add flour, baking powder, salt and carrots and mix for one additional minute.
Pour batter in pre-greased pan.
Top with walnuts or pecans (optional).
Bake in preheated oven for 45-55 minutes or until toothpick pulls out clean.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash Wednesday is just 5 days away, and I'm planning to try to attempt to maybe possibly if I can manage give up pop for Lent.

... I'll wait until you stop laughing in disbelief. ...

I might as well try, right? But I also have 2 1/2 two-liters of Diet Coke in my house right now, and we certainly don't want that temptation staring at me next week, do we? So, if you see me in the next few days and notice a jittery, I-AM-CORN-HOLIO* level of hyperness, now you know why.

* this is a beevus and butthead reference, for those unschooled on such juvenile television.

Happy Birthday to Natalie!

2011-02-27T19:38:00.000-08:00

Taken by Maggie to show off her new piggytails

Miss Natalie-New is now two! She celebrated her birthday on Wednesday at daycare. (Reading between the lines = Mama Guilt.) But, I got there in time to see her eat the frosting off her cupcake and open her toy. Then, K, M, and I took her to Chinese for supper, as per her request. And THAT is where she REALLY turned two.

It's been a while since I've heard such a fit over something so small. Natalie refused the high chair and I was fine with that. But when I tried to put her in a booster, she was P. O.'d. Screamed like you wouldn't believe. She did win, in that she knelt on her chair through the meal (it looked so painful!) and I won too because I made her say, "no booster, please" before she could get off the booster seat. (Just appease me and pretend that I won, too, okay?) And fits like that have been pretty constant since then, over what clothes to wear, shoes to wear, which doll to take to bed, what to eat for snack or supper, even which hair bow to put in her hair. As a dear friend would say, Natalie just got her wheels.

The girl seriously never stops moving!
Makes getting a picture impossible.

But she isn't all sass; there's plenty of sweet in there, too. She has been giving the best hugs and kisses. And her giggle is just awesome, especially with the little bit of growl that comes with it. Why, yes, I said growl. My two-year-old daughter loves to growl. She growls in anger, in joy, when playing, when mad... she growls.

She also is really starting to talk. We have heard a lot of "Noooooo" this week with a few "yessssss" thrown in there. She's reached a stage where she loves to repeat whatever is being said, so we're trying to take advantage of that and boost her vocab. She'll say "wa-dat" and point to about everything. Phrases that are perfectly clear include "I want that" and "Ni-night" and all her sisters' names and "shoes" and "baby" and "juice"... all the important things.

The girl doesn't stop moving. I swear she even runs in her sleep! And, she doesn't like to walk; she just runs from place to place, like a little weeble wobble. One of my parenting goals was to get my kids to 2 without stitches, and I thought for sure Natalie was the one who'd break my luck on that one. But somehow, she's made it to two without stitches or a broken bone. Considering how she climbs and jumps and runs, it's amazing.

Healthwise, she's still in a cycle of illness-antibiotic-1 week recovery-illness. I'm just hoping in a month, when it starts warming up, she can finally kick this thing and get stronger. None of it's critical, thankfully, just colds and ear infections and the like. But it doesn't slow her down any.

A moment of shyness while celebrating
her birthday with G'ma S,
whose birthday was Saturday

She's also determined to be a Big, as Lainie puts it. Natalie helps unload the dishwasher (spoons, plastic cups and bowls), move dirty laundry to the laundry room, pick up toys, and set the table. It's not that I'm a slave driver employing child labor to ease my day... wait, maybe I am. Truly, she wants to do it and throws a fit if someone beats her to it. (Refer back to the second paragraph of this post.) She wants to play what they are playing, do what they are doing, and get what they are getting. I think it's a sign of things to come, for years to come.

Natalie-new isn't so new anymore, and she doesn't look like a baby anymore. I think of the changes coming in the next 6 months, the two biggest being a move out of the crib and hopefully potty training. It reminds me to take the time to read one more bedtime book and snuggle one more minute. Because that minute is just too short.

In other news... 4-H

2011-02-19T20:51:00.000-08:00

Saturday, Katie and Maggie participated in their first club 4-H days. First off, wow. That was exhausting! Even with my MILs fabulous help, it was just too much confinement for the littlest ones. Next year, I think I'll line up a babysitter for Natalie and/or Lainie.

Then, Katie started the day on a rough note, literally. She sat down to play her piano solo and misplaced her hands on "the big big piano." She even said she thought it sounded differently because our piano is out of tune. DOH! But, I was very proud of her. She played it a second time, flawlessly that time, and did not freak out or cry. Red ribbon.

Next up was Katie's demonstration on how to make a rag doll. She again made us very proud, talking about what she wanted to talk about, going through the actions. Only complaint is that she was awfully quiet. She is proud, too, of her first demonstration and blue ribbon to show for it.

Katie AND Maggie were both involved with their club's model meeting, which resulted in another blue. Kudos to the club leaders (adult and youth) for their pre-day organization and preparation.

And lastly but never forgotten, Maggie had her show and share. Basically, she stood up and explained how she made her painted jewelry box. She earned a participation ribbon -- no judging for such a young age group -- and she had fun. Fun, as in the signature Saturday-Night-Fever motion FUN!... the exact way she said it in her presentation, too. As I described to another mom from our club, Maggie IS my rainbow.

To make it a full 4-H weekend, we have our club meeting tomorrow and Katie and Maggie are scheduled for their program talks. Thankfully, they can just repeat their presentations from today, so it should be a breeze and they get more practice talking in front of people. Each time they do, it'll get easier and easier.

Who knew my girls needed practice talking!

Lainie's IEP

2011-02-18T20:06:00.000-08:00

Lainie’s IEP today was a hard pill to swallow.

I’m so grateful her teacher had called a few weeks ago and gave me the heads up that it didn’t look like she’d be heading to kindergarten next year. She doesn’t qualify for a para and doesn’t have the speaking skills or confidence to talk in a classroom full of kids. She barely talks in front of her class of 10 or so. As her teacher put it, “If Lainie needed help with something, she wouldn’t ask the question to get the help she needs.” That statement alone helped me be at peace with her needing to wait a year. No big deal, right?

But it is a big deal. That was the goal, to keep her on schedule with her age group, to try our best to get her to prepared for kindergarten on time. Three years of speech therapy, 2 years of preschool, so many learning games and practices and speaking stuff at home… but it wasn’t enough.The seizure-related damage won this round.

Well, today I feel like I got a second gut punch. Today’s IEP was a full assessment. It not only discussed speech, but also looked at cognition, OT skills, behaviors, etc. Any cognition delay or hesitance to play with others could be attributed to her lack of speech. But OT delays? Not so much. And OT delays she does have. “Significant concerns” I think is how the occupational therapist put it. And that hurt.

Then, Jay asked about her getting an OHI (Other Health Impaired) tag. That’s the same label my brother has. I wanted to scream, Lainie’s not handicapped!! But in some ways, I guess she is.

And then the idea that she’ll need help for years… oh my lord, it just hurt.

It’s not just a speech delay? She’s maybe not tracking across midline? Need for occupational therapy? Cognitive deficit? Long-term assistance?

Seems the seizure did a lot more damage to little Lainie than I thought. Seems the shadow of that horrible week will be looming for a while longer.

And yet, I have to keep telling myself, she’s here with us. We’re lucky she’s even alive. She has come so far! She is a determined little girl. She is a joy, she is happy, she is perfect. I know all this, I really really do. But right now, I guess I’m grieving my hope for her recovery. Right now, I’m readjusting my expectations for her, at least for the next few years.

So, what’s the plan? Preschool this year and probably next, maybe summer school. OT twice a month for 20 minutes each time. Speech 10 minutes 4 times a week at preschool plus speech twice a week for 45 minutes at K-State. One on one breakout time at preschool. Maybe start some sort of dancing… the OT gal said that could help, too, and you know she’d love it. Medically, weaning from seizure medicine this summer for a repeat EEG to check for seizure activity and probably an MRI and/or CT scan to check for any concerns in her brain, maybe see any areas of atrophy.

But this weekend? The plan is to just have fun. Paint some nails. Watch sisters’ 4-H demonstrations. Eat pizza. And remember how lucky we are to have her here.

Lord, I would rather endure a million sad, painful meetings like today than to experience one day without my Lainie Sue. Thank you for the gift you gave us, and for the reminder of how precious and precarious that gift is.

Family Accomplishments

2011-02-13T22:02:00.000-08:00

What did our family accomplish since Friday at 4?

Packed the car for 6
Drove to Wichita
Had a great visit with my parents. (Wish it could have been longer!)
Presented at a veggie grower conference
Finished valentines for Monday
Ate lunch with Jay's parents and his grandmother (Also too fast, too short!)
Worked on Katie's 4-H presentation
Nearly finished my class presentation
Studied for an entrance RN exam (I'm taking it tomorrow!)
Finished a final project and final paper (That's the end of Jay's class!)
Cleaned the house
Called friends, family and neighbors to ask for help to ...
FINISH WRAPPING THE NEW HIGH TUNNEL!
Fed those friends and neighbors who could stick around for supper
Unstuck those who got stuck in the mud
Made a life-changing decision... I think. Maybe. More on that later.
Patched a split lip and treated an allergic reaction that lasted 2 days, AND
actually did spend some quality family time together in there somewhere

Things will settle down soon. Really, it will. Maybe. In May.

Need some help

2011-02-06T19:38:00.000-08:00

As most of you probably already know, Maggie can't have sugar. That is to say, her body just can't process table sugar like the rest of us can. Fructose (fruit sugar) doesn't cause her any problems, but if she eats a high sugar food or eats many low sugar foods, she gets stuffed up, coughing, allergic response, slight swelling in her face, and horrible, BD-type behavior.

She knows this, but she's 7. And impetuous. Three weeks (or so) ago, she snuck high sugar foods and, as a result, coughed day and night for week, had troubles at school and home, was stuffed up, tired, achy. It wore off in about a week. Two weeks ago, she did it again, with the same result. You'd think she'd learn, right?

Tonight, I caught her mid-sneak. It was just peanut butter, which I don't restrict much. But going at a jar of peanut butter, with a spoon, in the dark, when you are supposed to be in bed, and jumping when she got "caught", means she at least thought it was a taboo food.

And this, just minutes after talking to her about Valentine's Day and how she absolutely must not eat the candy at school and MUST bring it home to exchange with some of her favorite, non-sugary treats and her promising. But now, I don't know if I trust her to not sneak it at school or on the bus or both.

So what do I do? What would you do? Let her try to do the right thing and try to trust her to not eat the candy? Risk her shocking her body into sickness again, at the risk of having to up her asthma medication? Treat her with prophylactic allergy meds just in case, even if they "dope" her up? Restrict her from even attending the Valentine's Day party? Ask the teacher to take away all Maggie's Valentine's and have Jay or I stop by the school to pick them up, so she can get the cards but not the candy?

Seriously, I need some advice here. What would you do? And how else can we get it across the Mags that, for her, sugar is toxic... at least for now.

On the docket

2011-02-04T21:47:00.000-08:00

I have a crazy couple weeks ahead of me. I would almost say this will be the hardest part of the semester, but I'm guessing time will prove me wrong on that one.

On Monday, we have the fourth and final test for our Med-Surg class.
On Tuesday and Wednesday, I have a.m. clinicals in Beloit, leave at pre-crack-of-dawn.
On Tuesday, I'll get back to Clay Center just in time to pick up Lainie and take her to speech, and won't get home around 6:30.
On Wednesday, the girls have activities that'll keep me running until at least 7. I'm hoping to go to bed around then, except...
On Thursday, we have our Med-Surg ATI. It's like a final for the class, except it's a standardized test. Must pass with 80% or higher or you're out.
And the following Monday, I am taking the test that'll be the deciding factor on if I get to go to RN school next year.

So, no Super Bowl for me. I will be spending Sunday afternoon and evening studying my tail off. Why not Saturday? Because Saturday is my mommy day and Jay's garden day. Because my girls and I are going to run errands and prepare 4-H stuff and clean house and do laundry and hopefully paint nails and all that stuff. Because when I told Natalie that tomorrow was a Mommy Day, she clapped her hands and laughed for joy.

At least I hope it was joy. Maybe she was just cogitating her next evil plan.

Overheard on a snow day

2011-02-01T18:42:00.000-08:00

From Katie

"The long-haired cats are shunning Lily because she doesn't have as good a coat as them."

"Should I go help daddy bring in wood? Do I HAVE to go help daddy bring in wood? Can't I just watch from here and be supportive?"

"You're going down to the ground like a rock in the river, missie Mommy!" to me during a Wii battle.

---------------
From Maggie:

"You're not nursing home old; you're just not school-young." to me, more age trash-talking

"Lainie and I are fairies, but Katie is just evil..."

"Lainie, you are being a horrible student. You are NOT listening to me!" while playing school

------------

Lainie

"We're going on a bear hunt..."

"I am a big. Natalie likes to stay a baby."

"No, Natalie! No, Natalie! No, Natalie!"
-------------

Natalie

"My baby!"

"My necklace!"

"My turn!"

Sunday afternoon

2011-01-30T18:33:00.000-08:00

What does a typical Sunday look like in our house? Well, I did this:

Lainie and Maggie's clothes laid out for the week.

And this:

Natalie's outfits for the week. A must, since Jay gets her ready every morning, solo.

While Jay did this:

New greenhouse. Once it's wrapped in plastic, the high tunnel within will be disassembled and moved.

And Natalie did this:

Natalie aka Cinderella

And Lainie did this:

Rock-star dress-up!

And Katie and Maggie did this:

Nail boutique, sister-style

All to avoid this:

Test tomorrow. I'm still procrastinating studying; can you tell?

Haiku

2011-01-25T17:32:00.000-08:00

My aunt Lucille asked me what adjective (alliterative adjectives) I would use to describe each of my girls. Well, in my sleep-deprived, adrenaline-high state this afternoon, I wrote them each a haiku instead.

Maggie
Exuberant she
mighty in mind and in mouth
Always in trouble

Katie
Lovingly lovely
Wants to please you, everyone
Brain bustin', beauty

Lainie
Angel entrusted
Mighty spirit overcomes
Person locked inside

Natalie
Destined for stitches
Keeping up, climbing up, NOW
Free hugs on demand

And how about one for me:

O.R. today ROCKED!
Loved the fast pace, blood and guts
Hope to do more soon.

Our Favorite Potato Soup!!

2011-01-21T21:06:00.000-08:00

I found our favorite potato soup recipe!!! It's been missing for months and I wasn't quite able to duplicate it without the recipe. But what was lost is now found!!

Wow. I think I just likened soup to the biblical prodigal son. ouch.

Anywho, here is the World Famous Hearty Potato Soup Recipe

6 medium potatoes, peeled and sliced
2 carrots, diced
6 celery ribs, diced
2 quarts water
1 onion, chopped
6 Tablespoons butter or margarine
6 Tablespoons flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1 1/2 cups milk

Cook potatoes, carrots, and celery in water until tender, about 20 minutes.
Reserving the liquid, drain the vegetables and set them aside. (I set my strainer on top of my Pampered Chef super-sized measuring cup to catch the liquid.)
In the same pot, saute onions in butter until soft.
Stir in flour, salt, and pepper.
Gradually add milk, stirring constantly until thickened.
Gently stir in cooked vegetables.
Add reserved cooking liquid, 1 cup at a time, until soup is the desired consistency.
Serve as is, or make it a loaded hearty potato soup by sprinkling crisp bacon and shredded cheese on top.

Waffle cones

2011-01-20T21:06:00.001-08:00

Sometimes the circumstances that drive me to try a new recipe are beyone strange. For example, today Jay treated three of the girls to Call Hall for ice cream, Maggie snuck sugar multiple times today (tomorrow's going to U.G.L.Y.) and I'm hungry for a snack and too broke to go out for ice cream.

Thus, waffle cones. Because I don't have to share (they are full from the sweet snack) and it doesn't have to be sugar/cinnamon free (because Maggie is in trouble) and I have all the ingredients (so no run to town.)

And if you're going to do waffle cones, who better to mimic than Miss Butter Herself, Paula Deen.

1/2 cup sugar
1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
2 eggs
1 stick butter, melted (see, Paula Deen at her best!)
2/3 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
Pinch salt
Nonstick cooking spray

Beat sugar, vanilla, and eggs until cream.
In a separate bowl, mix together the flour, cinnamon, and salt.
Whisk the dry ingredients into the sugar/egg mixture.
Spray waffle iron (or even better, a pizzelle iron, but since I don't have one of those, a waffle iron)
Pour 3/4 Tablespoons batter onto iron and cook until baked and brown.
While still hot, I pushed them into a cupcake pan to make little waffle bowls. They'll come out squishy but will harden to a crisp as they sit.
Once cooled, serve with a scoop of ice cream.

Second verse different than the first, please

2011-01-19T05:31:00.000-08:00

When I get worried or scared, I tend to get angry. And, Natalie is really starting to make me mad.

When Maggie was 2, she started getting sicker. She would get one ear infection or upper respiratory infection after another, getting better as long as she was on antibiotics. But as soon as the meds wore off, she'd get sick again. And then, her body was too stressed and she threw a seizure. It was diagnosed as a febrile seizure, but in hindsight, with a fever of just 99, according to Lainie's neurologist, it wasn't febrile.

And if you know our family, you know Lainie's story. Her first seizure was also after 3 months of continuous illness, nothing major but just many consecutive illnesses. She too would get better with meds and get sick again as soon as the meds were out of her systems. Her fever was also 99 when the first seizure hit, but all her seizures were synced with illnesses.

Now, Natalie has been sick since Thankgiving. She gets better with antibiotic but once it wears off, she gets sick again. Last night, she spiked a 103 fever with no other apparent symptoms. She was twitchy but no seizure, thankfully.

I'm trying to be faithful, to put it in God's hands. I am really listening as I say "Thy will be done" but I hope he takes requests. I'm not even worried about a seizure and not even requesting no seizure; my request is for no damaging or life-threatening seizures. Please don't hurt my baby... that's not too much to ask, is it?

Keep Stacking

2011-01-17T20:42:00.000-08:00

I think Jay and I would kick some serious tail at a Jenga tournament. After all, we are champions at stacking one thing on top of another in a precarious position, just barely maintaining some semblance of balance.

It seems Mr. Slick needs 4 credit hours by next December in order to renew his teaching license. (It's a state rule; to renew for the next 5 years, he must have at least 4 credit hours.) The good news is, we are planning ahead. We know that growing season plus teaching plus classes for Jay will be too much. So, he found a course that meets all his criteria:

Is online delivery
Focuses on Math
Focuses on Technology
Doesn't cost a fortune
Meets his renewal requirements
Is done before the garden kicks in high gear

And so, from January 24 to February 13, Jay will be taking a 3-hour graduate-level teaching course, parenting, working full-time, starting a few thousand seedlings, and finishing the new high tunnel, while I am going to school full-time and parenting ...

Suddenly, I look like the slacker.

Holy Crepe!

2011-01-16T20:26:00.000-08:00

I made my first-ever crepes on Sunday morning, and have just one question: why didn't anyone tell me they were that easy?!?! They didn't take many ingredients, everyone was full before I ran out of batter, and holy moly they were delicious!

First make the crepe batter:

1 3/4 cup milk
1 cup flour
2 eggs
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
1/4 teaspoon salt.

Whisk until smooth. (See? EASY!)

Filling:
I didn't have any fresh fruit or the ingredients for the recipe book's filling, so I made my own:

8 oz cream cheese, softened
2-3 Tablespoons apple pie jam
2-3 Tablespoons peach jam
1-2 Tablespoons honey

Beat until smooth.

Now put it all together...
Heat a pan to medium-high heat and spray lightly.
Pour in about 3 tablespoons (not quite 1/4 cup) of batter.
Lift the pan from heat and swirl it slowly to spread the batter in a thin circle.
Return pan to heat and cook the crepe until it is golden brown, about 1-2 minutes.
Flip the crepe onto a paper towel or a plate.
Dollop a line of filling down the middle of the crepe.
Roll jelly-roll style and serve warm.

Pampers Rocks

2011-01-15T19:44:00.000-08:00

Last month, I bought a jumbo box of size 4 Pampers diapers for Natalie. To my surprise, one-third of the diapers were size 5. Now, normally I wouldn't worry about it and assume we'll just use it eventually. But she's actually pottying in the potty and just moved to size 4s, so it's possible that she might never wear size 5s. (How's that for an optimist?!) So, since I had a snow day, I decided to contact Pampers and see if I could at least get replacement product.

Two days later, I got this response:

Thanks Linda for contacting Pampers.

I am sorry that the box of diapers you purchased had the wrong size of diapers in the package. I understand how frustrating that can be.

Our goal is to produce high quality products that consistently delight our consumers and I'm sorry this wasn't your experience. Please be assured I'm sharing your comments with the rest of our team.

Since your satisfaction means a great deal to us, I'm sending four $10 off coupons by postal mail, which will be good towards your next purchases of any size or version of our Pampers diapers. You should receive my letter within the next 2-3 weeks.

Thanks again for writing.
Jessica
Pampers Team

One more reason to love Pampers. They don't leak (on my kids), have great coupons, and apparently have pretty awesome customer service.

And, sometimes it pays to send an email.

Saving Social Security

2011-01-13T19:05:00.000-08:00

I don't know if you've heard, but social security is in trouble. There are too many people drawing on social security, with that number only going up as the Baby Boomers reach retirement, and there aren't enough paying in.

Well, I read an article the other day in the latest Reader's Digest that quoted Ken Dychtwald of the NY Times as he suggested one way to fix social security: "Be part of a smaller generation. Then you need to give birth to a large generation, so when you are in your 70s and they are in their 40s and 50s, they'll be (generating) enormous amounts of taxes."

In other words, Jay and I are doing our part to fix the social security crisis. Heck, most of the families in our church are doing their part.

So next time someone says something derogatory to me about the size of my family, I'll just say, "You are welcome!"

Prayers for a friend

2011-01-12T18:47:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine just got diagnosed with breast cancer. She's so young, has three little kids, and is braced for a fight. She and her family could use your prayers. At this point, she doesn't know what stage it is, so the prayers are that it's stage 1 and caught early.

Follow her on this journey and lend your support on her blog at:
http://bccarpenter.blogspot.com/

And God Bless all of you who have, have had, or will have to battle this disease.

Snow Day!!!

2011-01-10T13:19:00.000-08:00

Thanks to 6-ish inches of white powdery snow, my first day back to school turned into the first snow day of the year. Yay!!

So what did we do with our family time?

Bundled kids up to play in the snow and help sweep it off the high tunnels

Natalie didn't like being in the snow, even with her Christmas-Story-esque snowsuit

But she loved it as long as she was being held.

Sadie LOVED the snow, once we got her out of her pen. Isn't she HUGE!

Home Sweet Home!

What else did we do today?

Make blueberry muffins for breakfast
Took pictures for possible 4-H entries
Had crafty time (painting a jewelry box and many pictures)
Made Egg Drop Soup for lunch
Made Snow Ice Cream for dessert*
Jay made this cream-cheese filled carrot cake for snack
I made crescent rolls to go with supper
Took a nap!

Nap time continues for the youngest two, which is why I have time to post. This afternoon we plan to paint the girls' wooden letters to spell their names on their walls. The rest of the time will be breaking up fights, working on the ever-there laundry, and not thinking about tomorrow.

I needed today. I am not ready to go back to school. Unlike August, I now know how hard the schedule will be on me, on my family. I know I should have a better attitude, and I know I will enjoy the classes and clinicals. But, I will miss a lot of moments with my girls. It's only until May...we can do this.

Or, it can start blowing like it's expected to, and the ground blizzard will let me put off the start of the semester just one more day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Snow Ice Cream

This was SO delicious! I had heard of it before, and I think we made a version of it last winter about this time, but I don't remember it tasting THIS good. Thanks to a friend, Julie, for this recipe:

Regular version
1 gal of snow
1 T of vanilla
1 C of sugar
2 Cups of milk....stir and enjoy

Maggie's Dairy-free, Sugar-Free Snow Ice Cream
1 quart of snow
1/8 teaspoon vanilla
1/4 cup Silk soy milk
2 Tablespoons Splenda
Stir and enjoy!

And so we begin... again

2011-01-03T18:34:00.000-08:00

Natalie has been asking to sit on the little potty for about a month, but I, well, um, didn't believe her. I didn't feel like starting potty training yet, seeing as how she's 22 months old and her sisters potty trained at roughly 2 1/2, 3, and 3 1/2 years old. But, she's proving me wrong... or at least proving that she's interested in trying. The past two nights she asked (demanded is probably a better word) to sit on the potty before putting pajamas on. And both nights she wouldn't get up until she pottied. (In our house, we call that making yellow. I don't know why, so don't ask.) When she was done, she got up, got toilet paper, threw it in the potty, and said"All Done."

Spunky lil' one

Two times does not a trend make, but it does make for a happy mommy. It means that, sometime in 2011, I could possibly not have diapers to change for the first time in 10 years. Think about it: nonstop diapers since August 2001. Right now, we're looking at 9 1/2 years of diaper changes. Average 6 diapers a day (on a good day), 42 diapers a week for 494 weeks (9 1/2 years) equals 20,748 diapers.(BTW, Jay just bragged that he probably changed a good, solid 1,000 of those! LOL!). Anyway, roughly 25 cents per diaper calculates to $5,187. Okay, that's not as bad as I was expecting. But it would be a nice expense and inconvenience to be rid of.

So, Go Natalie Go! Literally!

******************
On the food front, to go with tonight's chicken, Jay made this salad from the veggies on our backyard:

Napa Cabbage and Carrot Salad

(Instead of ponzu, he just squeezed a fresh orange into the dressing.) It was very fresh, spring-like. I love the crunchy texture of the Napa cabbage; it's lighter than traditional cabbage but more substantial than lettuce. Definitely a do-again.

New Year, New Menu

2011-01-01T20:26:00.000-08:00

I am playing around with my menu this year, trying to use Google calendar. It lets me post the menu on the blog and update throughout, and share it easier.

The girls requested the Alphabet Menu to start the year again this year, and it makes it a lot easier to come up with menu items when I'm following the alphabet. So, we started with appetizer lunch aka leftovers from New Years, which translates to:

Lil' Smokies
Sweet and Sour Meatballs
Spinach Artichoke Dip
Pizza Dip
Carrots and Ranch Dip
Cheese and crackers

And lest you think my girls have refined palates, they pretty much only ate the cheese and crackers and carrots and dip. But I enjoyed the rest of it!

Speaking of New Years, I tried three new recipes for our New Years shindig and two failed miserably. (Roasted Carrot Dip and White Bean Dip) The third was delicious, at least to me. It had a fancy name, Brie en Croute, but is basically a wheel of brie cheese, with two to three tablespoons jalapeno jelly, wrapped in puff pastry sheet and bake at 400 for 20 minutes.

So, appetizers take care of the A. Next is Beef Burgundy, crockpot style, substituting beef broth for red wine.

Today's Parenting

2010-12-28T20:21:00.000-08:00

I'm a bit proud of how today turned out. I knew we had a lot of cleaning and sorting that needed to be done, and I knew that Katie and Maggie were not going to be happy about doing them, especially with all the new toys and gadgets to play with. So, I decided to make it a game.

I made a list of easy chores, cut them out and put them in one bowl. Then I made a list of the hard chores (clean play-room, clean out Sadie's pen, sort socks, sort puzzles) and cut them out and put them in another bowl. Then I started a list of fun things to do.

Katie and Maggie had to draw one chore at a time from the easy chores and get them all done before moving onto the hard chores. If they got through both bowls without whining or screaming, then we would do the stuff on the fun list. And, while they were working on their lists, I had to do my own mega-list, try to keep Natalie safe*, and give Lainie manageable chores, too.

So what did they get done? Laundry washed, dried, and sorted; dishwasher unloaded three times today; books picked up from all bedrooms, living room, playroom, and foyer; all beds made; both K and M/L's bedrooms picked up; bathrooms cleaned; and trashed picked up. They also played with Sadie, cleaned the poo out of her pen, sorted a huge stack of puzzles, and helped sort socks. Lainie helped me clean up and organize the play room, and helped with the dishes. And I got all the laundry put away, the laundry room cleaned, the kitchen cleaned, Christmas decorations (except tree) put away, and playroom really cleaned. No screaming and no whining, too! So, we made a Sonic run during Happy Hour, two girls got rainbow baths, and I painted everyone's fingernails tonight. Tomorrow, we will make some shrinky-dinks and do a Wii tourney, maybe even paint a picture or two. Best of all, our house is all ready for a New Years shindig.

*but the failure of the day was keeping Natalie safe. She tried to stand on the footstool that goes with our glider rocker, and hit the floor face-first. By her scream, I knew something was wrong so I picked her up and took her to the kitchen for inspection. (This is the part that makes me laugh.) She was snuggled into my shoulder, so I turned backwards and asked Jay if there was any blood. He said, "No, not yet anyway." So I turned her around and pulled her off my shoulder, only to see my shirt, her shirt, and her face covered with blood. So much for asking for Daddy's input! (In his defense, she was snuggled into my shoulder and hiding her mouth.) Long story short, she bit through her tongue in four spots, all pretty deep, but all stopped bleeding after a couple minutes. She didn't want to eat supper, but loved that slushy from Sonic.

No permanent damage, thankfully, unlike Lainie's nose-slam on Sunday. Did I mention that it's possible she broke her nose on a Sunday morning fall? It's not crooked enough to worry about a doc visit and it's not affecting her breathing or anything, but it is a lovely shade of purple.

So, yes, we earned 1 Parenting Point for getting the girls to do chores without whining, but we lose 2 Parenting Points for battle scars from the week. Maybe tomorrow's goal should be to pad the living room for the week.

Speak Up!

2010-12-26T20:06:00.000-08:00

Natalie doesn’t say a lot; at least, she doesn’t say much that we can understand. But tonight she made herself perfectly clear.

We drove around town tonight to look at Christmas lights, and the big girls (Katie, Maggie, Lainie) were singing Christmas carols the entire way. If you know anything about kids and carols, you know that there is only one volume at which they sing: LOUD. Throughout the singing, Natalie sat silently in her seat, to the point that I thought she was asleep. But, after about 15 minutes, Natalie yelled at the top of her lungs, as clear as can be, “HUSH!” only it was more like

“HUSH!!”

I laughed so hard, I had tears in my eyes. I guess she wanted a Silent Night after all.

What a difference

2010-12-19T21:00:00.000-08:00

I know it's a cliche, but what a difference a year makes.

Last year at this time, I was recovering from thyroid surgery, working at K-State. Now, I'm healthy, still not needing thyroid supplement (the half left is carrying the load), and halfway done with my LPN degree. I miss many aspects of K-State, but I also believe if I had stayed, the job would have drained me and I would have drained those around me. I am happy and scared with my career change, and hoping the next year and a half go quickly and smoothly.

It was a big year for our family. Last spring, Jay was laid up with osteomyelitis. His foot doesn't hurt him now, which I think is amazing, considering how significant the surgery and infection was. I just think how grateful I am for my cousin, who convinced us to get it check out. The "what if's" if we had waiting another week or two or three..... I shudder to think.

Lainie continues to make big progress. When she started speech at K-State, she was 2 years 10 months and her expressive language was assessed at 1 year 10 months. Now, she at 4 years 7 months, her expressive language is at 4 years 2 months. She's worked hard to get to where she's at; we all have. Her articulation is still in the 6th percentile and will be the focus for the next few years. But, she's doing well and can now communicate with us, when she wants to.

Maggie has matured so much this year. She is still boisterous, exuberant Maggie, but she has learned how to control herself in most situations. She is still naturally loud, but can be quiet if need be. Her speech, too, has made incredible bounds. She can now make the s and sh and ch and th sounds on command, even though she still slips up in conversation. I continue to be amazed at the power of speech therapy!!

Natalie-new is almost two. She is onery, to say the least. She came in the kitchen the other day, mad at her sisters, with her little arms crossed and her lip out. She stomped her little foot and pointed. Maybe I'm grateful she's not talking, because she had nothing nice to say that day! She is talking, when she wants to. She skipped saying individual words and jumped right now 2 and 3 word phrases. I'm not sure if it's 4th-child-itis or a speech delay, but I think we have enough IEPs to carry us for now. Besides, as the story above shows, she communicates her wants and needs in her own way.

And Katie...my little girl is becoming a pre-teen. Someone told me that adolescent girls where high-heels in the daytime and cuddle their teddy bear at night. That pretty much sums up what stage she's in, half-little girl, half-grown. It scares me to realize how quickly she's grown. SLOW DOWN, I want to scream. But time doesn't slow, so I best make the most of the time I get with her. It feels like if I blink, she'll be too old to bother with annoying mom anymore.

What else happened this year? Buster, our chocolate lab, died. A few months later, we got Sadie. She has been a really good dog. She still jumps, but that's to be expected out of any 5-month-old dog with lab and weimaraner in her. We also finally managed to keep some cats around, with four yellow cats taking up residents near Sadie's pen.

The garden business continues to grow, literally and figuratively. Jay bought a greenhouse and has it mostly installed; it's just lacking one more set of supports and plastic. That brings the total to 1 greenhouse, 3 high tunnels, and 2 mobile high tunnels.

And I'd say that about wraps up my version of a Christmas letter this year. Some day this week, I hope to get the girls to sing a Christmas song, but since I lost my camera, that might be a bit trickier than usual. You might have to settle for their picture, instead.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good year!

Roberta's Sloppy Joes

2010-12-07T18:33:00.000-08:00

Since I got to do homage to my Grandma Pete in the last post, I thought I'd honor someone else's mom in this one. No, it's not my grandmother-in-law, Roberta, although she's sent me some fabulous recipes. This recipe comes from my August-Mom friend Sue, straight from her mom's recipe cards. And every time I make it, someone asks for the recipe. Super easy, super yummy, super sloppy. :)

Roberta's Sloppy Joes

1 1/2 pound ground beef
3/4 cup ketchup
4 Tablespoons Worcestershire sauce
1/4 cup white vinegar
1/2 cup water
4 teaspoons sugar
2 teaspoons dry yellow mustard
1 bag frozen corn (that's my mom's addition...gotta have corn in sloppy joes)
Hamburger buns

Brown the beef and drain off any grease.
Add all other ingredients and bring to a simmer.
Simmer for 20 minutes and serve -- OR -- spoon the meat mixture into a crockpot and cook on low for 2-4 hours.
Serve on hamburger buns.

Broccoli Soup

2010-12-05T18:17:00.000-08:00

Well, after that last post, there was a fight in our fridge. Seems that broccoli felt a bit bent out of shape and cauliflower getting all the attention. And so, to make peace within the cruciferous family, here is my absolutely favorite broccoli recipe, via my never-forgotten Grandma Pete:

Grandma Pete's Broccoli Cheese Soup
(makes enough for 8-10 people)

3 Tablespoons butter
3 Tablespoons onion, chopped
6 cups chicken broth
12-oz package frozen broccoli OR 1 head fresh broccoli, chopped and steamed (I use the Ziploc steam bags)
8-oz package wavy wide egg noodles
6 cup milk
pepper
1/8 teaspoon garlic powder
1 pound Velveeta, chopped

Melt butter in a large saucepan.
Add onions and saute until translucent.
Add the chicken broth and bring to a boil.
Add the noodles and cook until tender, about 10 minutes.
Add the broccoli:

If using frozen broccoli, add it and cook until tender, about 5 minutes.
If using fresh broccoli, steam it in the microwave. Add it to the saucepan and immediately go to the next step.

Add the milk, pepper, and garlic powder. Reduce heat to low.
Add the Velveeta and cook until cheese is melted, stirring occasionally.

Cauliflower Soup

2010-12-03T18:07:00.000-08:00

I'm borrowing this from Pioneer Woman. I haven't tried many of her recipes, but if all are as good as this one, then I'm game!

FYI, if you want some fresh, locally grown cauliflower, carrots and bok choy, you can order it through our CSA at http://www.rvp.locallygrown.net/

Cauliflower Soup

1-2 heads cauliflower, chunked
1 large carrot, peeled and diced
2 stalks bok choy or celery, diced
1 large onion, diced
4 tablespoons butter or margarine
2 tablepoons dried or fresh parsley
2 quarts chicken broth
4 (more) tablespoons butter
2 cups whole milk
6 tablespoons flour
1 cup half-and-half

In a large saucepan, melt the butter or margarine.
Add the onion and stir until translucent.
Add the carrots and bok choy. Stir for 2-3 minutes, until they start to soften.
Add the cauliflower and stir together.
Add the parsley and (again) stir.
Cover, reduce heat to low, and let simmer for 15 minutes.
Add 2 quarts of chicken broth. Increase heat to medium and bring to a boil. Then reduce heat to simmer.
In a separate saucepan, melt 4 tablespoons butter.
While that is melting, in a separate bowl, whisk together milk and flour. (I used my salad dressing mixer and it worked great! Just don't forget to relieve the pressure after mixing it; otherwise the lid pops off the top and across the room. It was pretty cool, but... back to the recipe)
Add the milk/flour mixture to the melted butter, making a white sauce. Stir constantly while it thickens.
Add half-and-half to the white sauce.
Pour the white sauce into the cauliflower pan and stir until well combined.
Let simmer for 15-20 minutes and enjoy!

Two meals in one

2010-12-01T17:55:00.000-08:00

With our crazy schedule and limited income, we are all about re-using leftovers in some creative way. Some of them don't work and end up being dumped. Others, like these three recipes, are definite repeats.

Day 1: Pork and Beans

1 pound ham hocks
1 16-oz bag pinto beans
6 cups water

Add all three ingredients to a very large crock pot. (Keep in mind the beans will more than double in size while they cook.)
Turn on high for 8-10 hours, until beans are soft.
Serve with warm cornbread... at least that's how we do it in our house.

Simple, right? Now, expect leftovers and use them in this recipe:

Day 2: Taco Soup

1-2 cup leftover pinto beans with ham pieces (be sure to remove any bone)
1 pound ground beef
1 package Taco Bell taco seasoning
1 bag frozen corn
1 cup chopped bell pepper
2 cups shredded cheese
sour cream
tortilla chips, optional

Cook the ground beef thoroughly.
Mix together, in a large saucepan, the beef, beans/ham, taco seasoning, corn, and bell pepper. Cook on medium heat until the corn in cooked through, about 15 minutes.
Serve topped with shredded cheese, sour cream, and tortilla chips.

Egg Drop Soup

2010-11-29T17:55:00.000-08:00

Hey, did I mention I'm in school full-time this year? Ya... doesn't leave much time for posting. But, I've found so many new recipes in the past month that I really want to share them. First on the list, Egg Drop Soup. If you've only ever had Egg Drop Soup at a buffet restaurant, then give this a try. It's the real deal and SO much better.

Egg Drop Soup

4 cups water
4 chicken bouillon cubes
1/2 teaspoon grated fresh ginger
1 tablespoon soy sauce
1 tablespoon cornstarch
2 eggs, lightly beaten
2 green onions, chopped
Salt and pepper, to taste

Boil the water in a medium saucepan. Add the bouillon cubes and boil until dissolved.
Remove 2 tablespoons of the chicken bouillon broth and put in a small bowl.
Add ginger and soy sauce to the saucepan and bring to a boil.
To the 2 tablespoons broth, add 1 tablespoon corn starch. Stir until dissolved.
Slowly add the corn starch mixture to the saucepan, stirring constantly for 1 minute.
In a separate bowl, slightly beat the two eggs.
Reduce the heat on the saucepan to simmer. Gently pour in the eggs, stirring constantly in one direction for two minutes.
Add the green onions. Let simmer for 3-4 minutes.
Serve warm with wonton strips.

Nice compliment!

2010-10-26T19:02:00.000-07:00

On the way to town tonight, the idea of mom swapping came up. Specifically, Maggie thought two boys in her grade should swap moms so that "the mom's hair matched the boy's hair." Then the conversation morphed into swapping me with another mom:

"Would you want to swap me for someone else's mom?"
"NO WAY!!"
"Not even for one that yelled less?"
"Oh, mom, you don't yell at us."
"I don't yell at you?! Really?!?"
"Well, it doesn't seem like much. Maybe a little, but only when we need it."

And that made me happy. I feel like I yell ALL the stinkin' time, usually to be heard over the chaotic conversations. It made my heart smile to know that how I feel isn't how they hear it.

And, they'll keep me... for now. :)

October update

2010-10-16T22:13:00.000-07:00

I knew school would change how I did things; I probably underestimated how much less I would be able to do. My house is not clean. I miss my friends. I miss my husband. I make the kids a priority, because I think they need mommy time. And I study. A lot.

It's paying off. I got my first 100 percent last week and have a high A in my classes. I've learned so much information in such a short amount of time, but am really retaining it all. And enjoying it. It's easy to study when you are interested in what you are studying.

Katie is doing great in 4th grade. She is enjoying the lessons and loves any praise she gets for her academic success. Art club and dance make her the happiest 4th grader ever, except for those days when she's tired and a drama queen. I am getting little previews of what the teen years are going to look like, and I quiver with fear.

Maggie's gotten her behavior under control and has been a lot of fun lately. We had her 7th birthday party today at the bowling alley, and she proudly bowled the 2nd highest score. :) She is so creative and imaginative and I love hearing her vocab flourish. We are really hearing the benefit of her speech therapy, too, as she can now clearly say Rs and S's...still working on sh- and ch-.

Lainie too is doing great with speech. We hear lots of sentences and arguments and tattle taling. Even when I don't want to hear what she's saying, I'm just so darn grateful to be able to hear what she's saying. At this point, we are focusing on articulation, since her vocab and receptive communication is doing great, age appropriate. With the addition of speech we do get to see a bit of her argumentative side and I try very hard to treat her the same way I treated her sisters at the same age. I'm probably failing, but I am trying!

And Natalie! Oh, my, Natalie. Most days I call her Evil Kneivel. She still has no fears and loves to climb and jump and investigate and dig and did I mention climb? She has a fabulous belly laugh that's almost a growl and loves to give kisses. She's finally saying mama and, no, I am not tired of it yet. :)

We are a busy busy family with our eyes set on June. Just push through. We can do it. It'll be worth it. Please let it be worth it.

Maggie's Punishment

2010-09-12T18:12:00.000-07:00

Maggie had a bad, bad behavior weekend, and I was out of ideas for punishing her. And so, I made her write. She really, really, really hates to write, so it was a punishment of sorts. I don't know if it will help in the long wrong, but at least it made her uncomfortable tonight.

On the top of one paper, I wrote "What Maggie Did Wrong" and on the other I wrote "What Maggie Did Right." I helped her with some spelling, but I bet you can tell where she did it on her own. And so, for your viewing pleasure and so I can save it for prosperity, here are her answers.

What Maggie Did Wrong

I threw sand at Lainie eyes
I did not tak a nap.
I kept natilie up at nap time.
I liyed and sineeked. (I lied and sneaked.)
I wassth tv wene i wesetto night. (I watched TV when I wasn't supposed to.)

What Maggie Did Right
I heplded Dad with the garen. (I helped Dad with the garden.)

Baked Pigs in a Blanket

2010-08-31T18:54:00.000-07:00

I have a confession. Hotdogs are my go-to meal with the kids. They are easy, ready quickly, and cheap. Nutritious? eh... probably not so much.

Still, even hotdogs need spruced up every once in a while. This recipe takes about 25 minutes, start to finish, and the end result is yummy enough for even the adults to enjoy.

Baked Pigs In A Blanket

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup cornmeal
2 tablespoon sugar
1 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
4 tablespoons unsalted cold butter cut into small pieces
1/2 cup grated cheddar cheese
3/4 cup buttermilk
8 long hot dogs

Preheat the oven to 400 degree F and grease a large baking sheet.
Mix the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt and baking soda in a bowl.
Add the butter and and rub it in until the dough becomes crumbly.
Stir the cheese in the dough and make sure it is evenly distributed.
Create a crater in the dough and add the buttermilk. Using a wooden spoon, stir well and let it stay for around 3 minutes.
Turn the dough on floured surface.
Pat the dough in a rectangle that is about 15 inches by 7 inches.
Using a pizza cutter, slice the dough into 8 rectangles.
Roll the rectangles around the hotdogs and seal edges. Place seam-side down on baking sheet.
Bake for 13 to 15 minutes, until golden brown.

Enjoy!

Bi-monthly post

2010-08-29T19:30:00.000-07:00

I'm a pathetic blogger, I admit it. But, really, there is so much going on that I don't have time to maintain everything, and this is the lowest priority. Even now, I should be studying and instead I'm blogging.

There's lots new to share!

First, I'm a CNA. I got my certificate in the mail on Saturday. I've started my LPN classes. It's going to be a tough year, but it's only for 31 weeks. I have a LOT to learn but am really impressed with my teachers. We are all adjusting to the new lifestyle, the 5-days-a-week of daycare, the stricter budgeting. It will be worth it. I hope it is worth it.

K & M started school last week and are both doing fine. They are excited about their teachers, their classes, and all the new "now that I'm bigger" things they get to do. Lainie starts preschool on Wednesday and speech on Thursday, and is a little put-out that it's taken so long for her turn.

Somehow, Jay is still managing to go to two markets a week, while teaching his 5 preps and assist with the grade school math. He's had to pick up a lot of the duties I had to let go. The most complicated is getting Lainie to speech once a week. But, we're making do. One week down, 31 to go.

Sadie the puppy has turned out to be one of the best decisions we've made. She is a great little dog, soon to be a big dog. Already, she can sit and fetch. When we hollar "BABY!" she lays down flat, like a bear rug. That command is in direct reference to her future size; bull mastiffs are not small dogs. She's gained weight nicely, barks only when necessary, and is a sweet pup.

What else is going on? Well, go to www.jaysjellies.com to read about the garden, or go to kscook.blogspot.com to see what's been cooking.

And so, don't be surprised if it takes two more weeks before I post again. We're fine; just insanely busy.

Crockpot Breakfast Casserole

2010-08-29T18:53:00.000-07:00

For years, I have looked for a breakfast that I could put in the crock pot the night before. It had to be something the kids would eat but not too loaded with sugar. And, I didn't want bread pudding. After many failed attempts, I found this one. It's simple and tasty.

Breakfast Casserole

12 eggs, beaten
14 slices bread
2 1/4 cups milk
2 1/2 cups Cheddar or Monterey Jack cheese, shredded
1 pound sausage, cooked and drained
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground black pepper
2 teaspoons prepared yellow mustard

Grease the sides of the crock pot with butter.
Spread mustard on one side of the bread and cut bread into fourths.
Make layers in the crock pot of bread, followed by sausage, followed by cheese, ending with a cheese layer.
Beat eggs, milk, salt and pepper together. Pour over crock pot mixture.
Cover and cook on LOW heat setting for 8 to 12 hours.

To-Do Lists

2010-08-18T20:39:00.000-07:00

Years from now, I will wonder how we accomplished everything that we did and still live to tell about it. For prosperity's sake, here is my to-do list for Monday through Wednesday:

Start roast for supper
Mail Grill-Off publicity for grant
Submit salsa competition expenses for grant
Pick up pork from meat locker
Pick up freezer cups for sand plum and elderberry juice
Reserve Piotique booth
Pay property taxes (early!)
Call HealthWave to check status of app
Call Hotels.com to fix billing error
Check credit card transactions for any other errors
Sort 5 bags of sandplums
Process (boil, mash, juice sandplums)
Chop peppers, onions, and pork for frozen fajita-in-a-bag mixes
Call NCKTC to check scholarships
Deposit Katie's check from the fair
Sort elderberrires
Monday 2:15 pediatrician appointment
Pick up contacts from eye doc
Outside play with girls
Set up auto bill pay on new bank account
Check on life insurance policy status
Laundry
Exercise puppy
Deliver squash and tomatoes
Make elderberry juice
Pick green beans
Check girls' vaccination records
Ask S. to babysit girls
Write an 1,100 word article
Edit an 1,800 word article
Judge a Canadian Web site contest
Call girls' schools
Visit girls' schools
Check class rosters for K&M
More laundry
Clean kitchen
Load for Manhattan Farmers Market
Call Extension office about 4-H
Work on puzzle with girls
Drive to and set up for Manhattan market
Get girls ready for first day of school on Thursday
Contact N about carpooling next week
Paint everyone's toe nails... well, except Jay
Wednesday 10:45 doctor appointment

And, apparently, update blog!

Tortilla Roll-Ups

2010-08-11T16:10:00.000-07:00

Easy Roll-Ups

The girls wanted roll-ups for supper tonight, so I made my usual pickle roll-ups. Knowing Natalie doesn’t like things too spicy, I made a second kind of roll-up with turkey meat. While I love the pickle ones, the turkey roll-ups were delicious!

Corned beef lunchmeat
Deli turkey, extra thin
4 oz cream cheese, softened
1/3 cup miracle whip
2 tablespoons Ranch dip mix
shredded cheddar cheese
7 tortilla wraps

Mix together the cream cheese, miracle whip, and ranch dressing.
Spread cream cheese mix over tortillas.
For pickle roll-ups, place corned beef on cream cheese mix and spread pickle relish on corned beef.
For turkey roll-ups, place turkey on cream cheese mix and sprinkle shredded cheese on turkey.
Roll tortillas, jelly-roll style.
Place in refrigerator for at least one hour.
After an hour, cut tortilla roll-ups into 1-inch pieces. Serve cold.

Ten Bits of Randomness

2010-08-05T08:57:00.000-07:00

I took my CNA test yesterday and was thankful for the advice, "when in doubt, chose 'ask a nurse'." Results in 3-4 weeks.
Lainie broke out in hives yesterday, quite suddenly. At one point, she was one huge welt from her head to below her waist. Doc says treat with Benadryl. The Benadryl wore off last night, so she woke up with her eye swollen shut and her nose twice it's normal size, and a headache. I'm hoping this ends soon. Oh, and she has swimmers ear in both ears.
Natalie proved her toughness. Her cranky, evil ways are probably due to swimmers ear and tonsilitis. After just one dose of antibiotic, she was already cheerier. I heard the first laugh in two weeks from her.
It's 10:30ish and all four kids are sleeping. Probably doesn't bode well for our plans to go to the rodeo tonight.
I made watermelon rind pickles two nights ago. They are just sitting on the counter, calling my name. But, alas, I will wait until after the dentist appointment.
The Clay Center Farmers Market is sponsoring a salsa competition on Saturday. They are sponsoring it, I'm coordinating it. Here's hoping it goes smoothly!
The garden is starting to slow down but Jay's still pulling in double the income from last summer. We don't know why but we are grateful!
I took the girls shopping yesterday to get school supplies, restock socks and undies, and use a huge pile of coupons for Target. I ended up saving $93, $50 of which is a gift card I received for doing a health assessment for my insurance company. That's probably the most I've saved using coupons and discounts, ever.
I think I'm ready for school, supply-wise. I have 3 scrub pants, 2 scrub tops, a lab jacket, and a couple shirts to wear under the scrubs. I also have a stethescope, thanks to my going away gift from my co-workers. And, I bought a medical dictionary yesterday. I would like/need one more scrub top, but then should be set. This is getting real, fast.
I am off to the dentist, and then the grocery store. Man, these girls go through the food! But, thanks to the garden and the meat in the fridge, I'm still feeding our family of 6 for about $75 per week. I will get it down to $60 or less, once they are in school. I can only imagine how expensive it will be when they reach the teen years. Lordy, I'd better go to school and get a higher paying job, or something. :)

Faith

2010-07-30T20:51:00.000-07:00

It's official. I am unemployed.

I sat down tonight and reviewed our one-income budget. And then nearly hyperventilated. How is this going to work again?

But, then I remembered all the times I doubted before, the times when God did provide. I have to have faith that He will provide, that things will be okay. I need to stop looking at 3 months down the road and just focus on today, tomorrow.

Of course, I can try to help make His job easier, too. I applied for two scholarships yesterday and three more today. It can't hurt and might help, right?

I feel like I'm going through one of those trusting exercises, where you are blindfolded and your friend guides you through an obstacle course. Or, where you close your eyes and fall back, trusting your partner to catch you. I just need to remember to not tense up, to truly let go, and know in my heart that we will not be dropped.

Easier said than done, but I'm trying.

Since we last chatted

2010-07-16T09:48:00.000-07:00

Since my last post, I've had a birthday, planned a Grill-Off, finished my CNA class, guided Katie to finish up her 4-H projects, went to eight different doctors appointments (with a different kid each time), got to go to ONE of the girls' swimming lessons, sold at a market or two or three, picked some veggies, cleaned some house, did LOTS of laundry, attended a family reunion and made plans for a second family reunion (different side of the fam) for soon.

Exhale.

In chatting with my carpool buddy this morning, I realized that I drink more cans of pop in a day than I get hours of sleep. HUH? In other words, I was drinking (at my worst) 6 cans of pop in a day but getting less than 6 hours sleep. I haven't made time for running or any type of exercise. We've ate out more than I care to admit.

It's time to get healthy again.

By the time I start school in August, I plan to kick my caffeine habit and add an exercise habit. I hope to find out more about the local jogging group. I don't think I'll have it in me (or in my schedule) to do the mini-triathalon in August, especially since K & M will have a soccer clinic that day. But, I would like to try the 10K in September at Piotique. I need to get back to my meal menu and see how much prep work I can do in my days off in August.

Consider this a reset button, activated.

Celebrating with food

2010-07-04T12:04:00.000-07:00

I love the Fourth of July! Not only do you get to make things explode and spend as much time outside as possible, but you get the celebrate with friends, family, and food!

Our holiday menu includes Stuffed Hamburgers, red and blue potato chips, lots of cherry tomatoes, and frozen bananas with chocolate shell over them.

How about you?

My favorite holiday!!!

2010-07-03T21:18:00.000-07:00

Happy Independence Day!

Heard in our house

2010-07-02T09:31:00.000-07:00

It's never a quiet moment in our house o' girls, and most of the conversations crack me up.

Maggie and Katie are earning pennies for doing chores or for good behavior and losing them for fits or whining. Their goal is 50 pennies for $5 to spend at the July 4th celebration; more than 50 pennies will earn them $10. (I figure we'd spend that on them anyway.)

Last night Maggie went to bed without a fit, without sneaking a book, and without waking her sister, which earned her 2 pennies. When I was giving her the pennies this morning, Lainie asked for one also and then started to put it in Maggie's jar. Maggie screamed at her to not do it, so I gave her Katie's jar and Lainie put it in there. Then and only then did Maggie realize her mistake. Not only did she miss out on a free penny, but she made it harder to beat Katie to 50. And so she mumbed as she walked away, "Hmmmpf. I won't make THAT mistake again."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Natalie has been battling us at meal time for about a week. If she doesn't want to eat it, she's sent it flying. We've tried many different tactics to get it to stop and have it mostly under control. (And now that I've written that, come see us this weekend, while Miss N throws her food across the room!) So, yesterday afternoon, I gave her a chocolate chip granola bar for snack. Halfway through, she decided she didn't want it, but I told her she needed to finish her snack before she could get down. Little Miss methodically placed the granola bar pieces down her shirt and then turned to me and signed/said, "All done!" sneaky sneaky number four!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lainie made a princess hat at speech a couple weeks ago, and was wearing it around the house last week, using a blanket as a cape. I said, "what a pretty princess." Her response: "I not a princess! I a QUEEN!" as she turned with a flounce of dismissal.

~~~~~~~~~~

Katie cracks me up with her mis-spoken words, probably because I do it all the time, too. A few weeks ago, when the river was flooding, a lot of cars were crossing the river bridge just to gawk at the flooding. Instead of rubber-necking, Katie said, "Look at all those river-neckers!"

~~~~~~~~~

They come by it naturally. We heard a (sad) story about an elderly man who disappeared near the water at a nudist colony. Jay's immediate reaction? "Maybe he was out noodling." teehee

~~~~~~~~

These are all such normal, everyday conversations but they are what make our life so fun. Yes, we have fits and screaming and tantrums and whining. But it is stories like these that make my life so full of giggles, as long as I take the time to enjoy them and not try to push on through to the next activity or deadline.

Maybe that's what they mean by stop and smell the roses?

Cheese-Stuffed Zucchini Squash

2010-06-29T18:56:00.000-07:00

It's that time of year, when zucchini is almost as plentiful as mosquitoes... almost. I try to find as many creative uses for zucchini as possible, for ourselves and for those who are buying the produce at our farmers markets. This one was DEEE-licious!

Stuffed Zucchini Squash

4 large-ish zucchini, about 3 inches in diameter
1 cup bread crumbs
1 teaspoon parsley
1/2-3/4 teaspoon garlic powder
salt and pepper, to taste
2 carrots, peeled and diced
1 onion, diced
3 tablespoons butter
1/2 cup sour cream
3 oz cream cheese
3/4 cup mozerella cheese

Boil zucchini, whole, for 10 minutes. Remove from water and let cool to the touch.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Cut zucchini lengthwise and scoop out all the pulp. Save the pulp for later! Place zucchini in a casserole dish. (I needed to use two because I had such large zucchini halves.)
Melt the butter in a large skillet. Add onions and carrot and cook until onions are translucent.
Meanwhile, mush the zucchini pulp with a potato masher or fork.
Stir the zucchini pulp into the skillet with the onions and carrots. Add the bread crumbs, sour cream, cream cheese, 1/2 cup cheese, parsley, garlic powder, salt and pepper. Stir over low heat until cheeses are melted.
Spoon the cheese-zucchini stuffing into the zucchini halves.
Bake, uncovered, for 15 minutes.
Sprinkle the remaining 1/4 cup mozerella cheese on top of the zucchini. Broil for 3-4 minutes, until cheese is melted and stuffing starts to golden.

Summer Garden Casserole

2010-06-29T15:04:00.000-07:00

We picked a Napa cabbage this week and, it was so huge, I stretched it out into three meals. The first meal, we made a Napa cabbage salad. The second, we had cole slaw. And the third, I intended to make cabbage rolls. But, the leaves remaining weren't big enough to roll around the meat. So, I put together this summer garden casserole from a few different recipes.

Summer Garden Casserole
2-3 cups of cabbage leaves
4-5 carrots, cut matchstick-style
4-5 small onions, diced
2 teaspoon minced garlic
1 1/2 cup cooked steamed rice
10-12 small new potatoes, cut in half
1 pound ground beef, thawed
1-2 tablespoon olive oil
Salt and pepper to taste

Sweet and Sour Tomato Sauce
1 can pureed tomatoes
1 teaspoon garlic powder
2 tablespoons white vinegar
1 tablespoon sugar

Sauted diced onion in olive oil until translucent. Set aside to cool.
Mix together ground beef, onion, minced garlic, rice, salt, and pepper.
Place cabbage leaves in a microwave-safe bowl with 3-4 tablespoons of water.
Microwave cabbage leaves in covered dish for two minutes.
Make sauce by combining tomatoes, garlic powder, white vinegar and sugar in a saucepan. Heat to a simmer.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
In a dutch pan, place carrot matchsticks.
Layer steamed cabbage leaves on top of carrots.
Place new potatoes on top of cabbage leaves.
Mix meat mixture with 1/4 cup (or so) of tomato sauce. Mix well and form into 1-inch balls. Place meat balls on top of cabbage leaves.
Pour remaining sauce over meat balls.
Cover the casserole and bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour.
Sprinkle with cheddar cheese for the last 5 minutes, if desired. And we desire it, because we are a cheese kind of family.

And the results...

2010-06-19T21:26:00.000-07:00

Spectator award for Maggie

1st place for her age division for Katie, with a time of 9.27.

3rd place overall (for female milers) for me with a time of 8.11... and my first trophy for running!

Minimal hail damage for the drive home. :)

I am proud of my girls, and of me. It was a good day.

Rockin' the moment

2010-06-14T10:32:00.000-07:00

I have many doubts about my mothering ability, but I try hard, read a lot, go on instinct, learn from mistakes, and hope that some day my kids will grow up to be happy, well-adjusted adults. In the meantime, it is just plain hard to remember to do the right thing (let's talk it out... how do you feel... why do you feel that way?) and not resort to instinct (stop. whining. now.) My mom-goal is to have a nice mix of both, because some times it's not worth the explanation and other times the discussion makes all the difference in the world.

K and I are planning to run a 1 mile road race next week. It's just a mile, nothing uber-competitive, and M said she wanted to run, too. I was doubtful, very doubtful, that she would enjoy running a mile at all, being as how she hates to have to go All The Way Up Stairs. But, we gave it the good college try. K, M, & I set off down our road to run. Maggie loved it... for about 1/4 mile. Then she hated it. Every step. Hated it. Verbally, vocally HATED IT! It was comical to hear her: "My arms hurt, my legs hurt, it's too far, this is NO fun, I don't want to go anymore, go get the car and pick me up."

So, after the experimental run, I told her she couldn't run at the road race. Her face made that heartbreaking expression, the subtle change that means, "I'm hurt but I'm not going to give you the satisfaction of knowing it." And that's when a "Stop. Whining" moment became a "why do you feel that way?" moment.

It seems Miss Mags is a bit jealous of the little award Katie got the last time we ran the race, and she wants a trophy of her own. And, it just so happens this particular road race has a Spectator Competition, for the spectator who does the best, most creative job of cheering on the runners. Miss Maggie is nothing if not LOUD. The girl was BORN to be a creative spectator.

And so, four of us are headed off to the races on Saturday: K and I running, N riding in the jogging stroller (I think), and M decked out in her best spectator outfit, which I am certain will include her new duck call, a pink cowgirl hat, and a glittery scarf. I can't wait!

Weekly menu, June 13-19

2010-06-11T06:58:00.000-07:00

Sorry I haven't been posting many recipes. We've been on rerun mode, as far as cooking. Most of what I've made lately are things I've already posted or are old standbys. But, I do still have our menu to share, and this week has some new items on it. I'm just hoping Sunday night is a bit cooler, so I won't mind heating up the oven for baked potatoes and yummy chicken! The good news is that, despite our go-go-going and K&M home from school, our grocery bill has dropped considerably. That is due in large part to our garden veggies.

Sunday, June13
Chef salad
Twice baked potatoes, parmesean chicken

Monday, June14
Dipping lunch
Tacos

Tuesday, June 15
Taco salad
Vegetable stir-fry

Wednesday, June 16
Hot dogs, Mac-N-Cheese salad
Picnic supper

Thursday, June 17
Sandwiches
Fish sticks, mac-n-cheese

Friday, June 18
Cheesy tacos
Tater tot casserole

Saturday, June 19
Leftovers
Stuffed pasta shells

Deal making

2010-06-02T07:55:00.000-07:00

The blogging community is awesome, IMO. Why? Because so many shares their stories, their hearts, their souls. Just glancing through my favorite blogs, I read 5 stories so sad, so heartbreaking, so devastating. A dose of perspective is always a good thing. Jay and I, we have it easy, we have it good... no, we have it GREAT! How blest we are!

Doc said Natalie probably has a virus causing the cough/choke/gasp and upset tummy, and it will need to run its course. Daycare called and said Miss N had another 2 dirties, which means it's not as done as I had hoped it was yesterday. I just hope it doesn't continue, because I'm stringing parallels between N & L. Do you remember Lainie's months of diarrhea? That's what I'm afraid of.

Doc also said, with sad eyes, that what I described sounded like a seizure, and with big sis's medical history, not unlikely. She offered to schedule tests, an EEG, all that stuff, but was more than willing to wait and see. I don't want to put Natalie through all that for a one-time maybe occurence. And, even if she is epileptic too, so what? Knowing definitively isn't going to change it. I just wanted to know from Doc what the game plan should be, if N does throw a major seizure.

Then I heard myself think, actually say to God, "As long as she doesn't have a damaging seizure, I can handle it." What? Like I get to make the rules here? As if I get to decide what we will or won't cope with? That is laugh-out-loud ridiculous.

We will deal with what we are given, and that's that.

In the meantime, I will enjoy a few more thousand smile and giggles.

Natalie's turn?

2010-06-01T07:42:00.000-07:00

Lainie's seizures etc didn't just affect how we react toward Lainie. It affected how we parent all the girls. I appreciate every day a bit more and am grateful when they wake up, even if it is 6 a.m., because it means they DID wake up. Even when it's loud and chaotic with all the chatter, I am thankful for the chatter. And, there is an absolutely no eye-rolling rule, strictly enforced.

That said, Natalie's freaking me out. I worry that she had an absentee seizure on Sunday morning, maybe a second Sunday evening. She has been sick with something minor, and no fever. But, as I was changing her diaper Sunday morning, she jerked and then stared off to the side. I couldn't get her eyes to move, dilate, or change focus, even with waving, calling her name, snapping my fingers. Then, a few (maybe 20-30 seconds) later, she looked at me and smiled. Would that have even been noticed, if not for the seizure history in our family? Is that something you would wonder about as a parent?

Between that weirdness and the fact that she's gasped/choked awake Saturday, Sunday, and last night means we're headed to the doctor this afternoon, just in case. I'm hoping for tonsilitis... at least it would explain the gagging. As far as the other stuff, what can you! We just have to put it in God's hands and truly let go. Well, and hope. A lot.

French Toast Casserole, aka Hot Dog Bun Breakfast

2010-06-01T05:54:00.000-07:00

Hot dog buns were on sale for 68 cents for a pack of 8. At that price, I had to pick up a bag, even if we don't eat buns with our hot dogs. Since we are big breakfast eaters around here, I decided to make it into a breakfast.

6 hot dog buns, cubed
6 eggs
1/2 cup milk
2 teaspoons cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon alspice
1/2 teaspoon cloves
1/3 cup Splenda or sugar
1/2 cup raisins
2-3 Tablespoons butter or margarine
Syrup or powdered sugar

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray a 9x9 dish with Pam.
Beat together eggs, milk, sugar and spices.
Add the buns (cubed) and raisins until the bread is covered.
Pour egg/bread mixture into the dish.
Bake 40 minutes.
Add butter and about 3 tablespoons of syrup to the casserole. Bake 5-10 more minutes.
Serve with syrup or powdered sugar.

Katie added, "If you don't have a sugar allergy in your family, you could top it with a dusting of confectioner's sugar to make it fancy." I think she's watched too much Food Network.

Weekly menu, May 30-June 5

2010-05-30T13:02:00.000-07:00

Sunday, May 30
Ham sandwiches
Pasta and grilled chicken

Monday, May 31
Hot dogs, chips
Leftovers

Tuesday, June 1
Cheesy tacos
BBQ ribs

Wednesday, June 2
Grilled cheese
Homemade pizza

Thursday, June 3
Chef salad
Zucchini lasagne

Friday, June 4
Hot dogs
Kabobs

Saturday, June 5
Ham
Kid kabobs

Humbled... again

2010-05-28T20:22:00.000-07:00

When I got to daycare tonight to pick up L and N, there was a box waiting for me. Walleta said that it was left there the day before, while the crew was at the zoo. It had our name on it, and inside were new swimsuits for the girls. Not only did whoever bought these get the sizes right, they also found a rainbow one for Maggie and a two-piece for Katie. And, they included two sizes for Natalie, plus a dress and a new pair of shoes for Miss N. The girls were so excited! They had been asking for new suits but I was pulling the mom routine of "the suits you have fit and are fine." They were SO excited, in fact, that Lainie wore hers during supper and most of the night. I don't know who did it, but I thank you, whoever you are!

Then, when I listened to the messages on our answering machine, I learned that I was awarded another scholarship, this one for $1100! It is from a women's group in Abilene, a group I would never have heard of, were it not for Jay's parents' neighbor. She not only told me about the scholarship, but also made sure I had all the necessary information submitted and helped push it through the application process. I am so very thankful! That means that we now have the fall semester of daycare paid for through scholarships!

Some days, God's blessings are so evident, you can't help but trip over them.